Complete fail

So, there was this plan for today and due to something that I failed to do, that thing cannot happen today.

See, for the past few years we have been pretty negligent in the overall upkeep of our home. Internally we have done most of the day to day cleaning one would expect. But the long term type of stuff has been put off inside the house and except for cutting the grass shortly before the city decides to fine us, most of the outside of our home has been ignored.

As part of our plan to live in excellence and improve every area of our lives we decided that this could not continue. We got together, sat down and wrote up a list of the thing that needed doing, room by room inside and area by area on the outside of the house. The list is several pages long.

One of the items on that list was pressure cleaning the outside of our house. Due to vegetation that had grown up right next to the house in a  bunch of areas and deteriorating lawn furniture the bottom two feet or so of most of the front of our house is a greenish black color, which by the way, doesn't go very well with the exterior paint color of our home. The plants and furniture are gone but the greenish black color remains.

What was supposed to happen today is, I was supposed to get up early go out to Home Depot, rent a pressure cleaner and then another roommate, one who has some experience in such matters, was going to use said device to pressure clean the outside of our house. What actually happened is, I failed to set my alarm and woke up way too late to get the required tool to clean our house today.

 If I were still the same person I was twenty years ago, or if I were like many people still are today, I would be beating myself up over this mistake. There would be stress, angst and frustration over how I screwed up such a simple task. My self worth would take a hit. I would probably avoid my roommate so I could avoid dealing with or in fact even admitting that I had broken an agreement. My day would effectively be ruined due to a simple dumb mistake. I would carry around all that negative energy without even realizing it and it would color other interactions that I have with people for at least today and maybe even longer.

But none of that would be useful or productive and it would only serve to lower the quality of my life. And THAT is unacceptable. So unless you want many of those same things in your life, I suggest and request for your own sake that you learn from my example. Instead of  beating yourself up over every single thing that you do wrong or that you forget to do, do what I do, and what I did in this case.

There was a light tapping at my door. I had been asleep. It instantly woke me. People don't normally knock on my bedroom door. So, I spent a moment going over all the things that were supposed to happen today. When I recalled the pressure cleaning that was supposed to happen today a loud expletive escaped my lips and I instantly knew what my course of action was going to be.

I put some clothing on and went out to talk to my roommate. I immediately admitted my broken agreement and took full responsibility for it. I apologized for the mistake and announced my intent to recommit. We renegotiated the plan to be exactly the same, just tomorrow instead of today.

I acknowledged the broken agreement, apologized for the inconvenience and set an expectation for what my future intentions regarding the agreement are. As long as the other party isn't determined to hold a grudge, this makes even complete failures turn into a win-win situation for all involved. And isn't that what we all really want? To be happy and relaxed and enjoy life.

A great new wonderful today

Welcome to a great, new, wonderful today. Welcome to a today that is pregnant with opportunities, overflowing with new possibilities for you to take advantage of, to make your life and the lives of those around you better than ever before.

Bah humbug you say? Yesterday sucked you say? Yesterday sucked, so did all the days before.Today is gonna suck and so will all the days that come after.

Well, sure. If you maintain that attitude you are guaranteed to be right. After all, attitude is everything. The universe brings you exactly what you honestly expect that it will. If you believe that your past is a mirror of your future, things can never get any better. If all you ever see of your past is darkness and no light and you think all that can be is what has been, your future is pretty bleak.

But why do that to yourself? In a universe filled with infinite possibility, one where you can have any future that you truly, deeply, honestly, desire, why create the same old dank depressing life you have always had? Given a choice, would you rather suffer through your future or enjoy it?

Why not fill it with warmth and light and hope? Expect more out of life. Politely demand it.

See the thing about yesterday is that its over. The past is static, unchangeable. You have taken advantage of every possibility in your past that you are ever going to. The future though is unwritten. It is dynamic.What is going on can change from moment to moment. Each day has more opportunity within it than you could ever hope to grasp. The possibilities are practically endless. You can decide at any point to make changes to your life that will make it better from this moment on.

If you are consistently convinced about and focused on how badly today is going to suck then you won't see the opportunities as they present themselves. If, however, you are absolutely sure that the current day holds opportunities for you that have so far been things undreamed of, if you know for sure that things are going to get better and better, your mind, heart and eyes will be open. This will enable you to see, experience, live and take advantage of those better things as they happen.

And tomorrow will be better still. Each day is a bigger, better day, than the day before it. No, you can't just skip ahead a few tomorrows. You need to truly live, experience and enjoy today. Though the past is static and unchangeable, each day builds upon the day before it.

Squeeze every drop of love and life and joy out of today, taking advantage of all the wondrous opportunities before you. Then and only then will you be truly prepared for the even greater, more awesome next day.

So again, welcome to a great, new, wonderful today and also welcome to a tomorrow filled with unlimited possibilities.

Sauce day

I woke up today and decided that I was going to go out and get the supplies to make tomato sauce. Tomorrow night, for dinner, we are having home made marinara sauce, angel hair pasta, meat balls, garlic bread and Italian sausage.

I haven't made this particular meal in a couple of years and around here it's somewhat legendary. It is a fan favorite amongst all who have ever tried it. And I personally love it. But it takes me eighteen hours to three days to make, depending on whether or not I start out with fresh tomatoes instead of canned. So, I almost never go through the effort.

What is funny about that is I am always saying I am gonna make it again soon. And I have tried to talk myself into it several times over the last few months. Not today though. I woke up and knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I was going shopping and that once I got the supplies, I was setting to work making this awesome food. It kind of a amazes me how this sudden desire came out of the clear blue and I am still wondering about it.

Why now? Why today? What makes it any better or different than any other time? As far as I can tell, there is no real rhyme or reason to it. The closest thing that I can guess is that something in my subconscious just slipped into place today when I woke up and I realized there was no reason not to do this thing that I am always saying that I want to enjoy and share with others again.

I find myself wondering how many other similar things there are in my life. How many times have you found yourself saying that you would like to do a thing and in fact you will...soon...

...And then found yourself months later still saying that thing and not having done it? I am not talking about things that you are prevented from doing by lack of funds or some other circumstance that actually stops you. This particular example is kind of a silly thing. But there really could be things that you want or need to change in your life that would massively improve it. I mean how many things can you think of that there really is no good reason for you not to do yet you still do not do them? How much better would your life be if you just woke up and decided to do those things?

You may have noticed that I do this a lot. A thing will happen to me and then I will look for examples of it in other places in my life. The reason for this is that many areas of our life are just mirrors of each other and things that show up in one aspect often show up in many if not every other aspect. And whenever possible I reflect on new information and do my best to incorporate that information into as many areas of my life as possible. That way each single thing can be used to its utmost efficiency.

I challenge you to do the same and see what kind of positive change it brings you.

If you could, would you go back and make different choices?

When I was in second grade, my mom got her GED. I went with her and just because I had nothing better to do, I took the pretest while she was taking the real thing.  We both did very well and the person giving the test jokingly said I should come back next week and take the real test and get my GED and get an early start on college.

I remember thinking to myself that would be insane.  I was seven, who could have possibly taken me seriously? Many hours were spent pondering this concept. And I could never imagine it, literally.  My main reason for not doing it was peer pressure, or really imagined pressure from my peers.  And I just could not shake the belief and possibly even fear, that due to my age, I would get taken advantage of in one way or another. What person between the ages of 20 and 50 is gonna give a seven year old the time of day, especially if that kid is acing classes that they are struggling with.

I have thought about it a lot over my lifetime. This was like thirty years ago, before the once popular TV show, Doogie Houser.  When that show came out I thought about it even more. Oddly enough, I never have watched a single episode though. It has occurred to me that I could probably have gotten a triple doctorate by the time I was nineteen or twenty. I mean scholarships and grants would not have been a problem. I have seen first hand that if you maintain a minimum of a 4.0 GPA, schools will bend over backwards to keep you.

If I had made that choice, my annual average salary instead of being five digits would likely be six or seven.  I would have easy access to a lot of creature comforts that are far outside my grasp even now.  The bottom line is, things would be different. The monetary and material things that I would have would be great.

But if I had made that choice, I would never have gone to the high school I did. I would never have met my best friend growing up. We would never have spent hundreds of hours with dozens of different roleplaying games like Dungeons and Dragons, Rifts and Vampire the Masquerade. I would never have met the people we gamed with  or dated any of the people that I was close to in my teenage years.  I never would have gone through the truly life altering experiences I had with Lifespring, that occurred as a result of knowing one of the people I gamed with. The connections that I made, that led to where I am today would all have never happened.  I would not be living with the people that I am today.

If I had gone to college at age seven, my story would be completely different than it is. I like my story and I love who I am as a result of the choices that I have made.  I have made mistakes. But I have always done my best to learn from them.  If I never made them in the first place, then I would not have learned anything from them. So while there are things that I wish I had never done, if I had my life to live all over again I would still make the same choices.

Now I ask you, can you say the same? Think about your life and where you are today. Are you happy with it? If not what changes can you make so that you are happy with your life? You can not change the past. But you can make better choices in the future, when faced with choices that are similar to the ones that you regret having made.