In self help, enlightenment and personal empowerment circles it has a pretty particular meaning. But what does transformation mean to you?
Well, for me, I think about the first time I ever saw the show The Transformers. It's been out for decades. We've probably all seen them somewhere in pop culture, even if you have somehow managed to avoid watching the blockbuster movies directed by Mr. Explosions.
The first time I ever saw a Transformer, it went something like this.
Wow, cool, that's an awesome looking car. I like the detail on the... Holy F$#% it just turned into a robot. Man! That thing has freaking lasers and everything! Mind...officially...blown (brain matter oozing out the ears)
Personal transformation is the same for me. Even at their worst, every person is a truly amazing piece of work with some fantastic unbelievable stories. We all have had crazy experiences that to one degree or another justify who we are and where we are in our lives. No matter where the starting point for the transformation is, we are all awesome, awe-inspiring living machines. Every person, happy or not, pleasant to be around or not is an eleven on a scale of one to ten.
But once we stop letting others hold us back, once we leave behind our limiting beliefs,once we decide enough is enough, once we decide that we are worth it and that we are willing to fight for our happiness and to do everything possible to make our lives better, every one of us instantly jumps up an order of magnitude. That's right. Transformation makes each one of us a 110 on a scale of 1 to ten.
Stop playing small. You are worth so much more. You are so much bigger and have so much more to offer friends, family and indeed the whole world than you have been. Your mind and heart expand to the point where that tiny little box you have been calling your life no longer is big enough to contain you. The walls and roof explode outward as the new you busts out searching for a new and larger niche to contain the new you and your new experiences. Old problems shrink away in fear at the new larger more empowered you. New challenges arise, but nothing can stop you unless you let it.
Seeing people transform, watching them fight their way out of their cocoon, indeed, out of the wreckage of their former lives and watching them take flight out into their great big new world of possibility, fills my heart with love and gratitude for the opportunity that I have to lead people through their trials and tribulations, to help them on their journey from darkness and fear and into the light. It brings tears of joy to my eyes every time I see that certain light of understanding in someone's eyes, when it finally clicks and they get what their life could be like as opposed to how they have been living and when they in that same moment decide that their life is going to change.
Assisting people in making that kind of transformation is literally what I believe my purpose on this planet is. It is what makes me the happiest and is what I live for.
What's yours?
Showing posts with label decide. Show all posts
Showing posts with label decide. Show all posts
Tuesday, March 11, 2014
Thursday, January 16, 2014
The key to a successful life
Do you ever see people that have the kind of life that you want? They have all the things that you want in your life. You resolve to make your life just that way but how? There are so many little details that need seeing to. How can you ever possibly hope to get all your ducks in a row? When you focus on the big picture it seems impossible.
It can be done but first you need to think about things logically. Looking at the whole scene all at once obviously isn't gonna do it. How about working towards the other end of the spectrum?
To start with do you know what it is that makes a successful life? That would be a lifetime where we have more successes than failures. But that's too big of a goal to start of with, it has too many uncontrolled variables.
What makes up a lifetime of success would be a few decades of successes. That still sounds daunting. You may not be able to guarantee decades of success. How about a single decade of success? That would be ten years with more success than failures. Still a bit much.
How about a year of success? That's only 12 months. It's starting to sound reasonable but still not something we can see ourselves committing to. A single month is only thirty days. Some of us could commit to that and use it as the anchor point for our successful life. But not all of us would be confident in our ability to do so.
Let's go to a single 24 hour period. While it may just be a tiny slice out of a successful life, there is no legitimate reason why we can't commit to and follow through with having a single successful day at any point that we decide to.
Now to be realistic, nobody is going to succeed at everything they do every time they attempt to do something, especially if what you are doing is new or unfamiliar. But if you are willing to put forth a little effort, you certainly can succeed more than you fail. And if you have more successes in a given day than failures then that day can be considered a success.
It's why in Alcoholic's Anonymous people are asked to commit to only a single day without drinking. Just get through one day. Then when you wake up the next day recommit for that day and so on until eventually you have control of your life.
Seven days of success makes a successful week. Four weeks of success makes a successful month. Twelve months of success makes for a successful year. Ten years of success makes for a successful decade. Decades of success make for a successful life. But it all starts one day at a time.
You should pick a date in the future when you will have all of the things that you want. Say maybe 10 years into the future. Then scale your vision back to what your life will need to look like in five years so that you can make that ten year goal. Next scale it back to what your life will need to look like in 1 year to meet your five year goals. Then do the same thing for six months in the future, then three, then one. Then figure out what steps you will need to take starting two weeks from now to meet your one month goals. And last but not least decide what changes you need to make starting tomorrow to get to your two week goals.
Then starting tomorrow begin making those changes. But once you have the road map to your future in place, don't focus on the big picture. Focus on making now a success. If you consistently focus on making each now successful the future will take care of itself and your life will be a success.
It can be done but first you need to think about things logically. Looking at the whole scene all at once obviously isn't gonna do it. How about working towards the other end of the spectrum?
To start with do you know what it is that makes a successful life? That would be a lifetime where we have more successes than failures. But that's too big of a goal to start of with, it has too many uncontrolled variables.
What makes up a lifetime of success would be a few decades of successes. That still sounds daunting. You may not be able to guarantee decades of success. How about a single decade of success? That would be ten years with more success than failures. Still a bit much.
How about a year of success? That's only 12 months. It's starting to sound reasonable but still not something we can see ourselves committing to. A single month is only thirty days. Some of us could commit to that and use it as the anchor point for our successful life. But not all of us would be confident in our ability to do so.
Let's go to a single 24 hour period. While it may just be a tiny slice out of a successful life, there is no legitimate reason why we can't commit to and follow through with having a single successful day at any point that we decide to.
Now to be realistic, nobody is going to succeed at everything they do every time they attempt to do something, especially if what you are doing is new or unfamiliar. But if you are willing to put forth a little effort, you certainly can succeed more than you fail. And if you have more successes in a given day than failures then that day can be considered a success.
It's why in Alcoholic's Anonymous people are asked to commit to only a single day without drinking. Just get through one day. Then when you wake up the next day recommit for that day and so on until eventually you have control of your life.
Seven days of success makes a successful week. Four weeks of success makes a successful month. Twelve months of success makes for a successful year. Ten years of success makes for a successful decade. Decades of success make for a successful life. But it all starts one day at a time.
You should pick a date in the future when you will have all of the things that you want. Say maybe 10 years into the future. Then scale your vision back to what your life will need to look like in five years so that you can make that ten year goal. Next scale it back to what your life will need to look like in 1 year to meet your five year goals. Then do the same thing for six months in the future, then three, then one. Then figure out what steps you will need to take starting two weeks from now to meet your one month goals. And last but not least decide what changes you need to make starting tomorrow to get to your two week goals.
Then starting tomorrow begin making those changes. But once you have the road map to your future in place, don't focus on the big picture. Focus on making now a success. If you consistently focus on making each now successful the future will take care of itself and your life will be a success.
Monday, December 16, 2013
Hell or Paradise?
In order to avoid a seeming eternity of never ending pain and suffering, could you, would you, do and say nice things to, about, and for everyone else around you? I hope so because that's what it takes to endure the time in peace and happiness.
But, I am not talking about the afterlife. No, whether or not you live in hell or paradise here on Earth, is entirely up to you. How is this possible?
Well for the most part, you get back what you put out. Most people have the impression that others are out to "get them". This really could not be farther from the truth. The average person is just going through life trying to survive, looking out for number one, so to speak. They aren't conscious enough about you and what goes on in your life to spend the time or energy to intentionally make things difficult for you. People generally do not do things to hurt you. They do what is best for them. And sometimes that means doing things that are not good for others. But they are not out to get you.
Most people are actually completely neutral towards those that they do not already know. Now think about this. If you are neutral towards a person who starts out being neutral towards you, you will get very little back but at least it won't be negative. Now if you are hostile towards someone who starts out neutral towards you, what happens? They become hostile as well. And if you are good and kind to others who have no previous impression of you, they tend to be good and kind in return don't they?
Imagine a person sitting in their easy chair in front of the fireplace waiting for the heat to come out. They never put any wood into the fireplace but they are demanding warmth. Do you think they will ever get it? Of course not. It just does not work that way. In order to get the warmth you first need to supply the fuel and start the fire.
We all want warmth and good will from others. But, in order to get it we need to be warm and good to others. We get to start the fire and make sure that it has plenty of fuel. Then in nearly every case, we will get warmth and good will reflected back to us. The best part of all is that this method is both reflective and additive.
As you build up your relationship with each person, you each tend to mirror the others outpouring of energy towards one another. With each reflection the strength of the bond and the energy between you continues to grow. You send back the positive energy that the other person sent towards you, plus a little bit more due to your current happiness with the way things are turning out. They receive your warmth and return it back, plus a little extra to reflect their own happiness with how things are.
This is the way that nearly all great friendships and romances start and is a wonderful recipe for eternal happiness and peace. We do decide every day of our lives, whether we realize it or not, whether we are going to live in hell or paradise, right here on Earth. There is no need to wait until you are dead to have the rewards of a good life. Why torture yourself and others all the years of your life by acting out of fear and hatred when you could instead live in paradise?
But, I am not talking about the afterlife. No, whether or not you live in hell or paradise here on Earth, is entirely up to you. How is this possible?
Well for the most part, you get back what you put out. Most people have the impression that others are out to "get them". This really could not be farther from the truth. The average person is just going through life trying to survive, looking out for number one, so to speak. They aren't conscious enough about you and what goes on in your life to spend the time or energy to intentionally make things difficult for you. People generally do not do things to hurt you. They do what is best for them. And sometimes that means doing things that are not good for others. But they are not out to get you.
Most people are actually completely neutral towards those that they do not already know. Now think about this. If you are neutral towards a person who starts out being neutral towards you, you will get very little back but at least it won't be negative. Now if you are hostile towards someone who starts out neutral towards you, what happens? They become hostile as well. And if you are good and kind to others who have no previous impression of you, they tend to be good and kind in return don't they?
Imagine a person sitting in their easy chair in front of the fireplace waiting for the heat to come out. They never put any wood into the fireplace but they are demanding warmth. Do you think they will ever get it? Of course not. It just does not work that way. In order to get the warmth you first need to supply the fuel and start the fire.
We all want warmth and good will from others. But, in order to get it we need to be warm and good to others. We get to start the fire and make sure that it has plenty of fuel. Then in nearly every case, we will get warmth and good will reflected back to us. The best part of all is that this method is both reflective and additive.
As you build up your relationship with each person, you each tend to mirror the others outpouring of energy towards one another. With each reflection the strength of the bond and the energy between you continues to grow. You send back the positive energy that the other person sent towards you, plus a little bit more due to your current happiness with the way things are turning out. They receive your warmth and return it back, plus a little extra to reflect their own happiness with how things are.
This is the way that nearly all great friendships and romances start and is a wonderful recipe for eternal happiness and peace. We do decide every day of our lives, whether we realize it or not, whether we are going to live in hell or paradise, right here on Earth. There is no need to wait until you are dead to have the rewards of a good life. Why torture yourself and others all the years of your life by acting out of fear and hatred when you could instead live in paradise?
Saturday, July 27, 2013
Competition
Today I want to take a look at something that shows up in life all
over the place. It shows up in business, in schools, in sports,
literally everywhere. In nearly all facets of life there is competition.
Whoever makes the most sales gets the promotion. Whoever does the best
on a test gets to be the front of the line when going out for recess.
Whoever scores the most points gets the better contract.
Regardless of what the venue, we tend to reward those who prove themselves to be better than everyone else. What about second best? What about all the people who honestly put in their all but did not quite make the cut. They all get left by the wayside. Nobody seems to care about them. This method creates a very cutthroat environment where there is no real reason for teamwork.
How are we supposed to create win-win circumstances in life with all this competition everywhere?
The simple answer is, you can't. It is not doable. All you can really do is decide not to compete. Competition comes down to judging one person as better than another. And it gets carried to ridiculous extremes with the first place guy or team often putting down others. But the thing about competition is that it always comes down to using very specific criterion to do the measuring of who is best at what. If the criterion changes who is better changes dramatically.
So what to do? Don't play the game. Decide that your life will be played by different rules and that winning is determined by what percentage of your possible effort you put into each thing that you do. Decide for yourself that you are always going to do your best. Commit to giving your all in everything that you do. Do not look at what others have done or are capable of doing. Regardless of how you measure up against other people, if you are doing your best, there is never any reason for you to be upset with your results. You may even find that putting all your energy into trying to be as good as someone else has been holding you back from obtaining your true potential.
In business, do not think that you need to make advertising campaigns and slogans to take business away from others who may be in your same marketing niche. You do not need to tear others down or make claims about being better than the other guy. Do not worry that other people produce more than you or sell more than you or that it takes them less time. Do not compare your product(s) to that of anyone else. If you are doing your all, no comparison needs to be made.
Your product(s) and efforts will speak for themselves. And pretty much regardless of what your market is, there are enough people out there in the world today such that if all you ever obtained were new customers that would still be enough to make you wealthy. Focus on putting out the best quality product that you can as efficiently as you can and you will be successful. And ultimately does it really matter who is number one as long as we can all be successful?
Regardless of what the venue, we tend to reward those who prove themselves to be better than everyone else. What about second best? What about all the people who honestly put in their all but did not quite make the cut. They all get left by the wayside. Nobody seems to care about them. This method creates a very cutthroat environment where there is no real reason for teamwork.
How are we supposed to create win-win circumstances in life with all this competition everywhere?
The simple answer is, you can't. It is not doable. All you can really do is decide not to compete. Competition comes down to judging one person as better than another. And it gets carried to ridiculous extremes with the first place guy or team often putting down others. But the thing about competition is that it always comes down to using very specific criterion to do the measuring of who is best at what. If the criterion changes who is better changes dramatically.
So what to do? Don't play the game. Decide that your life will be played by different rules and that winning is determined by what percentage of your possible effort you put into each thing that you do. Decide for yourself that you are always going to do your best. Commit to giving your all in everything that you do. Do not look at what others have done or are capable of doing. Regardless of how you measure up against other people, if you are doing your best, there is never any reason for you to be upset with your results. You may even find that putting all your energy into trying to be as good as someone else has been holding you back from obtaining your true potential.
In business, do not think that you need to make advertising campaigns and slogans to take business away from others who may be in your same marketing niche. You do not need to tear others down or make claims about being better than the other guy. Do not worry that other people produce more than you or sell more than you or that it takes them less time. Do not compare your product(s) to that of anyone else. If you are doing your all, no comparison needs to be made.
Your product(s) and efforts will speak for themselves. And pretty much regardless of what your market is, there are enough people out there in the world today such that if all you ever obtained were new customers that would still be enough to make you wealthy. Focus on putting out the best quality product that you can as efficiently as you can and you will be successful. And ultimately does it really matter who is number one as long as we can all be successful?
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