Reactive Vs Proactive

Welcome to a great new wonderful today.

While thinking through the victim and responsible stances, I noticed that there is one major difference between the two. Victims react. Responsible people proact.

Being proactive is about looking at the situation from different angles and figuring out ahead of time what the likely outcomes are and deciding what you will do in each of those possible circumstances. This way, you are ready for whatever happens. You are ready if things go the way you want them to and you are ready if they do not. And you already know what step to take next.

It may seem more interesting or romantic to not plan anything and to just let things happen as they come. And if you have no responsibilities, family ties, ambitions or goals in life it may work for awhile. But, generally, it eventually leads to sadness(and madness). The problem isn't the fact that you are being random and chaotic. The problem is the reactionary mindset. A proactive person knows that he is responsible for every outcome of every circumstance. The reactive person knows that everyone but him is responsible for every outcome in every circumstance. The problem is that the reactive person is wrong. He is just as responsible for everything that happens, he just chooses to blame others rather than accept the responsibility.

Take a minute and think about it, from the point of view of a boss hiring a new employee. Which person would you rather have working for you? Would you rather have the guy that is always whining and complaining about all the bad things happening to him and never prepared to handle new circumstances and responsibilities? Or would you rather have the guy that owns up to his errors has a kind word to say about everyone else in the office and is always prepared for more no matter how many curves you throw at him?

How about in a relationship? Do you want a partner that always blames everything on you no matter what happens? Wouldn't you rather be with someone that realizes that something went wrong, admits their part in it and suggests a better way of handling things in the future?

Have you noticed the trend? The reactive person places blame and the proactive person accepts responsibility.   Opposites attract right? So a reactive person and a proactive person should be a good match. Not really. Remember the reactive person is a victim. They whine and complain about everything. The other thing is blame and responsibility are not the same thing. The purpose of blame is finger pointing and often name calling.With blame there is no room for growth or change.  It is a completely negative thing. Responsibility is personal ownership of something.  It is empowering and allows for positive change.

Are you proactive or reactive? In your personal life, are you a victim or are you responsible?