Fear of the dark

There are a great many things in life that do not make sense to me. Most of them have to do with a thing that I see in others that I do not see in myself. Fear due to being surrounded by a lack of light is one of those things.

I do not understand this. Nearly half of the world is covered with it at any one point in time. It's mentioned or shown just about everywhere in books, movies,television shows, and songs. Why are so many people afraid of the dark?

For most people, it seems that fear of the dark is really a fear of not knowing what is out there. Or in other words, when we can not see what is happening we invent or imagine things to fill in the gaps. We superimpose our thoughts onto reality, literally taking something that is inside our head and planting it firmly within the darkness. People that do this are using their imagination in an unhealthy deconstructive way.

It seems to me that positive rational thinking people, that deal honestly and logically with the world would not have any reason to imagine monsters of any sort in either the light or the dark. Maybe I am wrong, perhaps there is no connection.
But I am not afraid of the dark. Or of the things that go bump in the night. I prefer darkness. Here in Florida, due to the heat, nighttime is often the only time where being outside is even remotely bearable, especially in summer.

I enjoy sitting alone outside, after sunset, feeling the air around me begin to cool, surrounded in a cloak of darkness, silently listening to the cries of birds, the buzzing of insects and other animal sounds, watching people scurry along, hurrying to be indoors. The darkness is a welcome home and a familiar friend. For me, it is comforting, relaxing and peaceful in a way that day time can never be.

I have been alone in the dark, in enough different places throughout my life that if there were monsters hiding there, somewhere, I think I would have seen them. Darkness is the natural condition just about everywhere that the light of the sun is not currently shining. Yet we treat the darkness as unnatural. It is true that there are dangerous things in the darkness, but no more so than there are in the full light of day. If we do not fear the light we should not fear the dark, for one is simply a lack of the other.

My son who just turned three is not afraid of the dark either. In fact, late in the evening he will often turn the lights out so that we can play with his toys in the dark. Studies show that between two and six is often when this fear begins due to a drastic increase in the use of the imagination that occurs in this time frame. I will observe carefully to see if this happens with him, though I have a suspicion that it will not. It is not in my nature to be afraid in general and from what I have seen so far, I think it may not be in his either.

Am I human pt2

Awhile back I wrote about part of an experience that happened when I was two years old. This is the other part of what I remember. And yes I am aware that what you are about to read seems like some crazy made up fantasy.  But I believe every bit of it to be true and those that really know me know that I would not make something like this up, especially considering my beliefs on the judeo-christian myth.

So the child forty feet or so below me ceases its cries for help. Suddenly, I feel an urge to be elsewhere. And suddenly I am. At first it seems dark, but as my eyes adjust, the darkness slowly falls away, peeling off bit by bit. Until at last, there is  brightness is everywhere. It is as if the ground the sky and everything around me are made of white light.

At first, this is disorienting and I stumble around blindly, not knowing where I am and having trouble differentiating between the ground and the air and things lodged within one or the other.  As the eyes tend to shy away from bright lights automatically, at first, it is difficult to look anywhere and focus on any one thing. Gradually my perception shifts and I begin to see each thing as its own light and to sense the places where one ends and another begins.

Yet somehow, even while stumbling around, I was heading in the right direction or maybe every direction lead to the same place. At some point though I feel the urge to stop moving forward. I do so and looking up from the ground in front of me, I see what looks to be the oddest shaped mountain in existence. The first thing that I notice is that this one immeasurably tall thing is a white gold in color as far as the eye can see. It is the only thing in this place that is not a plain white. It is also far brighter than all the white that I have seen so far. The intensity is such that another period of adjustment is required for me to be able to look upon this mountain without pain. Oddly enough, I find that I can not look away from it.

And then, a great sound, from too far away to possibly imagine, reaches my ears. The volume is such that I am certain anyone for easily ten thousand miles can hear the words, but I know they are meant solely for me. The air and everything around me literally vibrates with the deep, powerful, yet gentle rumbling of this voice. It soothes and caresses while also querying.

Suddenly, in my mind's eye, I see this enormous mountain that I have been straining to see all of. It is impossibly large. In my mind I see the whole of it and I realize that it is a brilliant gold being seated upon a throne of white.  As far up as I could possibly see before it got lost to my field of vision, the part that I perceived to be a mountain, was merely this being's right sandal and a couple of toes.
While taking all this in, I realize that I still have not answered this immense being. In fact, though the words completely surrounded me and massaged my very being, I had not yet considered them.

They came yet a second time.

Would you like to stay here?

All around me was at peace. There were others in the surrounding area. All were happy. There was no fear, worry, sadness, loss or pain. In fact now that I was really thinking about it I knew I was surrounded on all sides and in all ways by love in its purest form.

It truly would be pure bliss to stay here I thought. But I can not.
"No", I replied "there will be people that need me"

...and then a child woke from a coma in a hospital somewhere in south Florida. And I was once again that child.

The power of the memory of that experience is still enough to bring tears to my eyes to this day. Whether dream or out of body experience it somewhat blows my mind that at not even three years old I had the presence of mind to give up that wondrous possibility for even a brief time to choose being in service to others. It hits me that I felt I could not accept the peace and tranquility yet, because I had a duty to perform first.

Yet, every time I think about it, my belief that I am here to make the world a better place becomes stronger and stronger.

Despite what others may think of this tale, I honestly believe that my spirit directly interacted with the being that the Christians worship. But I am not a Christian, just a good Samaritan.