What's the story with history?

If all of the people on one side of a war are killed, the whole story can no longer be told. That is where the statement that "history is often written by the victor" comes from. With the unbalance left by only one side being properly represented, it should become obvious that history is not overburdened with facts. If you are old enough to read and understand these words, then surely you know that there are many different ways to describe any given set of events.

A factual accounting of things rarely if ever truly happens. Why is this? Well, first of all, because in just about every case, it is just super boring to only relate exactly what happened, just the way it happened. Also, most of the time what becomes "history" is what society remembers of a given incident. A great deal of history is verbal not written. Most of the time what is written and what society "knows" to be true about an event are vastly different.

There are those who were physically present for a given event. Then there are those that were not. Often those who were there tell the tale for those who were not. But, when those who were not there relate it to others something is lost because they did not have the experience themselves. The best they can ever hope to do, without repeating the story verbatim, is to relate their understanding of what happened.

What a person thinks about a given thing tends to color what he or she says about it to another person. More and different emotion gets added to the story with each new telling. Each person gives just a little of their own color to the story until at last someone who was actually present for the events being described may not even recognize the story as their own.

Most people aren't even aware though that the real tainting of a story happens before they share it with anyone else. Our own memory of a given event is often colored by how we think of ourselves, whether as hero or villain, empowered or victimized. Then when we share our story with others, we tend to put a spin on the story that makes us look the way we perceive ourselves to be. Sometimes we are embarrassed at our role in a given scene and may slightly alter the telling to make ourselves look more dashing or less foolish.

Other times we refuse to admit to ourselves that certain things took place. We may be afraid of what others will think if the whole and exact truth comes to light. Or we want to make some other person's role seem more villainous than it actually was. So when we share the tale, we omit certain details or tell things out of order.

All of this leads to our history being filled with falsehood.

There isn't really anything that one can do to change this since you do not have the power to control what others do and say. You can however decide at any point to have the courage to be completely honest, first with yourself and then others. Choose for yourself to remember things as they actually happened, not the way you wished they had. Memorize the boring old details and separate how you felt from what actually happened. When asked what happened, tell it just the way it was.

When your boss asks why you were forty minutes late, tell the truth. You woke up late, hence you got to work late.

Feel free to make up a dashing, daring tale, full of villains and fair maidens, dragons and knights. Imagine. Embellish. Create. Blame. Exonerate. But save the big beautiful lie, the faerie tale, for story time.