What is the deal with the epic amount of noncommittal speech and habit patterns in the world today?
When President Kennedy talked about our plans to put a man on the moon, did he say we were committed to getting 42 percent of the way to the moon by 1970? Or that we were going to put 52 percent of a man on the moon? No, he said we were gonna put a man on the moon before the end of the decade.
Has any athlete in history ever said they were gonna break 60 percent of a record? No, they devote their minds fully to shattering records and they do.
Has any pregnant woman ever been 85% pregnant or almost pregnant? No, she is either pregnant or she is not.
In self improvement circles there is a saying that 99% is the same as zero. You are either in one hundred percent or you are out. There is no middle ground. You are either 100 percent dedicated and focused towards your goals or you are simply wasting your time.
But take a quick glance at the internet or stop by a coffee shop and listen to people talk or even just pay a bit more attention around your home. If getting things done is about yes and no, why are there so many partial responses?
Would you like some coffee? Sure.
That is not a commitment towards having more coffee. It is an implied yes, assuming the other person is willing to get it for you or bring it to you, but left to your own devices you won't have more. You either want more coffee or you don't.
Are you hungry? Kinda.
This one is like being pregnant. You either are or you aren't. If you aren't hungry enough to give an absolute, trust me, you aren't hungry.
Words like kinda, sorta, maybe, mostly, sure, i'd like to and it would be nice, have their place but answering questions designed to get things done isn't the time or place.
When you are looking for some assistance painting a fence, and you ask for it, anything other than yes or no is a complete waste of time, both your time and the person that you have asked. Because while they are sorting through how they feel about the question and realizing that they forty two percent want to help me or 92 percent or even 99 percent, but there's just this one thing stopping them and if only they could resolve that thing then they'd be able to give a yes, but they can't resolve it because it's complicated, I mean there's this other thing that might make it possible, but they'd have to check with two other people to see if they can watch their own cat for once and then after helping their dad knock down a mailbox then they could probably sort of maybe help you with your problem.
In the ten minutes that it takes you to drag all that out of the other person you could have asked a dozen other people and gotten several yeses and nos. Clarifying a partial answer takes more time and energy than just giving a firm yes or no.
There is some part of the speaker's mind that knows whether the partial answer that is given leans more towards the positive than the negative, but most of us aren't mind readers and we have no way of knowing which it is, without asking. And if we are going to need to ask for clarification, what was the point in giving an answer in the first place?
You are not going to reach your goals in life by putting in partial effort. You are only going to get where you want to be by being clear and precise about what you want and how you plan to go about getting it. Make it a practice to remove the partial answers from your regular speech and you will find that there are less misunderstandings and much less time wasted in your life.
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