Next he showed an example of what he called a non countable infinity. His example was the set of real numbers from 0 out to infinity, which includes all of the irrational numbers, things like fractions, and decimals. He asserted that this was a non countable infinity simply because there was an infinite possible amount of irrational numbers between each whole number. If you started at zero, no matter how long you counted for, you would never ever even make it to the number one.
Actually, I agreed with him about this one. This was an example of it being impossible to count to infinity. But, my original assertion was that it was not possible to count to infinity at all. And he never did anything to prove or disprove that. He totally ignored it and just said that the "normal" infinity had been redefined by mathematicians as countable.
As far as grammar and word usage actually goes, his first example basically defined countable infinity by saying it was simply infinity. He might as well have defined a chair by saying that a chair is a thing that you use for a chair. Then he went on, for his second example, to say because this infinity has an infinite amount of infinities within it, it cannot be counted.
I pretty much told him so and at this point he began to get frustrated. He then proceeded to make several disparaging remarks about how I was not a mathematician and as such was more or less not equipped to understand. The sad fact is, I did understand. I just completely disagreed.
Regardless of whether or not one mathematician or a million tells me that there is an infinity that can be counted to, it does not change the fact that the very definition of the word infinity proves their assertion to be false. All infinities are limitless. None of them can ever be counted, whether there are an infinite amount of infinities nested within them or not.
The only difference between the first and the second example he provided to me is that on one of them you would be making progress in whole numbers and on the other you would never reach the next whole number. With both you would die thousands of years before even making a small dent in the work of reaching towards the far end of the endless stream of numbers. I did not disagree with him that they were different. I just disagreed that either one could be counted.
My primary beef with the conversation wasn't his fault at all. Well it sort of was but not really. The problem I had with what he was saying was the nomenclature being used. Now he did not come up with the jargon that he was using. But he did choose to use it around people that were not mathematicians. And even though the jargon chosen for this particular thing was actually completely ridiculous to the lay person, he did nothing to fight against it or to attempt to change it.
I can sort of understand him not wanting to argue semantics with the people teaching him, sort of. But when speaking to people that know nothing of math, using mathematical terms that directly disagree with common grammatical practices without precluding his statements with something to the effect that he realizes that the choice of jargon flies in the face of what the individual words actually mean was stupid. And it made him look like an idiot to every other person in the room. He isn't though. He is one of the smartest people I know.
This whole argument/debate could have been completely avoided. He could have said there is the normal infinity that everyone knows about including all the whole numbers from 0 to infinity. Next he could have talked about the infinity that includes both sides of the number line, positive and negative whole numbers from 0 to infinity. He could have described this as the integer infinity. He could have applied the adjective rational to both of these to show that they included only whole numbers. And finally he could have said that if either of them included fractions or decimals that the the adjective irrational would be applied instead of rational.
I am not a mathematician. I am a philosopher. Words are my tools and my weapons. There may be and probably are more infinities but simply mentioning these in this fashion would not have caused an argument. Mathematicians are very often brilliant people. Many of the things they have done have massively improved life for the rest of us. But when it comes to naming conventions for the new things that they discover, they are either idiots or so blinded be their current discovery that they just latch on to whatever seems appropriate at the time and stick with it as the "new" name for a thing and logic be damned.
He was arguing math. I was debating logic. Who was crazy? Who was right? Who is to say?
Saturday, May 31, 2014
Counting to infinity pt1
Time is not a real object. It is simply a concept that we made up to differentiate the passing of days. Events in our lives happen sequentially. They do not happen to us all at once. Time and the different markers that we have chosen for it such as hours, decades and seconds are not real. They are just ways of making it possible to describe what came before, what came after and how to decide where to place things when describing the story of our lives.
Numbers are the same way. Although we can make physical objects that represent the different numbers, numbers themselves are concepts. A tree would still be a tree regardless of what we chose to call it. As would a fish a fish and a bird a bird. These things are real and tangible.
We, as a society, place definitions on things that describe exactly what they are. We define them so that we do not need to completely explain every detail about each thing to each person that we encounter every time we want to talk about that thing.
But, life is seldom black and white. There are so many grey areas. Those that fight against the establishment often think of themselves as revolutionaries fighting to make the world a better place. The people that they fight against often call them terrorists or murderers. History, or in other words, the story that is told, is decided by the winning side. Who is right and who is wrong? Well technically, both are both.
People that disagree with what society chooses to call a thing are generally thought to be having a psychotic break with reality. By definition when society does things one way and a person chooses to do things another way that other person is either labeled wrong or insane. I mean think about it. If I call a tree what everybody else calls broccoli, I'd be insane right? Or how about if I called daylight a bunch of bananas? And does it really matter if it was one person or a whole group of people that thought this way? How does it work when these people call their terminology for the redefined things lingo or jargon? Are they still insane?
This brings me to a story that happened recently. We had a guest over for a couple of days. He is someone who is a good friend of ours whom I have known for over fifteen years. We don't always see eye to eye though.
He is a math major who actually intends to spend most of his life studying and teaching advanced mathematics. My interests are more along the lines of English and philosophy. Knowing these two things the disagreement we got into should be a surprise to nobody. I say disagreement because, to him I am sure, we were arguing. To me we were debating.
Somehow, the subject of infinity came up. He was saying that there were multiple different types of infinity. We all just nodded and smiled. The lay person knows that there is only one infinity and that it is infinite. And that is all we need to know. Mathematicians however know that the rest of us are wrong. And he proceeded to tell me so in so many words.
Mistake number one. Never ever tell another person to their face that they are wrong, especially in public, unless you are actually grading work that they have done. Even then it should only be done with extreme diplomacy and tact. Do not just smack other people in the face with what you know to be facts. If you do, even if what you are saying is as plain as the nose on your face, they will not agree with you. In many cases, you will make an enemy for life and all you will have gotten out of it is the satisfaction of showing your intellect to be superior to that of the other person. In other words, you may lose friends in exchange for a mild boost to your ego.
We are both kind of hardheaded and both actually may have violated this rule. He began by saying that there is the regular infinity that everyone is aware of and that mathematicians call it the countable infinity. I of course stopped him there by pointing out that the definition of infinity is a concept describing something that has no ending and therefore applying the adjective countable to it was a logical fallacy. He more or less ignored my statement and went on to state that there were then several types of infinity that were labeled as not countable.
He provided an example of a countable infinity as the set of whole numbers. You know like 0,1,2,3,4 and so on out to infinity. I challenged him to count to infinity. Even though I sat back and offered to wait while he did so, even though I offered him the opportunity to show me that it was countable, he declined.
Numbers are the same way. Although we can make physical objects that represent the different numbers, numbers themselves are concepts. A tree would still be a tree regardless of what we chose to call it. As would a fish a fish and a bird a bird. These things are real and tangible.
We, as a society, place definitions on things that describe exactly what they are. We define them so that we do not need to completely explain every detail about each thing to each person that we encounter every time we want to talk about that thing.
But, life is seldom black and white. There are so many grey areas. Those that fight against the establishment often think of themselves as revolutionaries fighting to make the world a better place. The people that they fight against often call them terrorists or murderers. History, or in other words, the story that is told, is decided by the winning side. Who is right and who is wrong? Well technically, both are both.
People that disagree with what society chooses to call a thing are generally thought to be having a psychotic break with reality. By definition when society does things one way and a person chooses to do things another way that other person is either labeled wrong or insane. I mean think about it. If I call a tree what everybody else calls broccoli, I'd be insane right? Or how about if I called daylight a bunch of bananas? And does it really matter if it was one person or a whole group of people that thought this way? How does it work when these people call their terminology for the redefined things lingo or jargon? Are they still insane?
This brings me to a story that happened recently. We had a guest over for a couple of days. He is someone who is a good friend of ours whom I have known for over fifteen years. We don't always see eye to eye though.
He is a math major who actually intends to spend most of his life studying and teaching advanced mathematics. My interests are more along the lines of English and philosophy. Knowing these two things the disagreement we got into should be a surprise to nobody. I say disagreement because, to him I am sure, we were arguing. To me we were debating.
Somehow, the subject of infinity came up. He was saying that there were multiple different types of infinity. We all just nodded and smiled. The lay person knows that there is only one infinity and that it is infinite. And that is all we need to know. Mathematicians however know that the rest of us are wrong. And he proceeded to tell me so in so many words.
Mistake number one. Never ever tell another person to their face that they are wrong, especially in public, unless you are actually grading work that they have done. Even then it should only be done with extreme diplomacy and tact. Do not just smack other people in the face with what you know to be facts. If you do, even if what you are saying is as plain as the nose on your face, they will not agree with you. In many cases, you will make an enemy for life and all you will have gotten out of it is the satisfaction of showing your intellect to be superior to that of the other person. In other words, you may lose friends in exchange for a mild boost to your ego.
We are both kind of hardheaded and both actually may have violated this rule. He began by saying that there is the regular infinity that everyone is aware of and that mathematicians call it the countable infinity. I of course stopped him there by pointing out that the definition of infinity is a concept describing something that has no ending and therefore applying the adjective countable to it was a logical fallacy. He more or less ignored my statement and went on to state that there were then several types of infinity that were labeled as not countable.
He provided an example of a countable infinity as the set of whole numbers. You know like 0,1,2,3,4 and so on out to infinity. I challenged him to count to infinity. Even though I sat back and offered to wait while he did so, even though I offered him the opportunity to show me that it was countable, he declined.
Wednesday, May 28, 2014
Video games. The bane of modern society?
Awhile back, I made mention of a video game, Grand Theft Auto V. Within a couple of days of its release it had made over a billion dollars in sales. That is a truly astronomical figure and considering what the game is about some may wonder if life as we know it is being ruined by video games in general.
Don't know what I am talking about? Perhaps you don't have a child above the age of ten in your house. Or maybe you don't own a gaming console. As the name implies most of the series is about grand theft, either of or committed with cars and that's the lighter side of the game. Then there's the possibility of hooking up with prostitutes, having your way with them and then beating the tar out of them to get your money back. Although there is a main story line, the general idea is to commit as many crimes as you can possibly get away with all whilst avoiding or taking out the police.
Video games are certainly making a splash in a big way. Many of them such as the GTA series, are outselling every other form of media out there, including books, television, music and even blockbuster movies.
A lot of these games explore and even glorify the bad things that we do to one another. There are quite a few different gaming franchises where the entire purpose of the game is to murder a bunch of other guys before they murder you. Except instead of murder its called warfare. Semantics.
Are these games ruining the moral fiber of our country? I don't think so. I think it is the parents that allow their children to play these games that are damaging our country. And the problem isn't even the fact that they let them play the games. The problem is that they let the video games do the parenting, instead of teaching their kids between right and wrong.
Many young kids and teenagers today have such a screwed up moral compass because the only moral lessons they have received is murder, maim or mess up the other guy, before he can do it to you. Video games are just tools. While primarily designed solely for entertainment purposes, if there is no other source of teaching, they will teach the morals and ideas that are within them.
If however, we, as parents, teach our children right from wrong, how to tell the difference between the good guys and the bad guys, and that we want to be the good guys and then don't let our kids play the games that have all of those potential "bad" lessons until they have shown through their way of being that they are on the "right" path, then any game, no matter how violent or morally questionable goes back to simply being a way of blowing off steam. It becomes just a fun thing to imagine, but something we would never do in real life.
When I was a kid, I used to tell my parents that video games had a large range of potential positive effects, things like, improving my memory, teaching pattern recognition, improved creative problem solving and increased hand to eye coordination. They, of course didn't believe me. But when we played the same games I always beat them. Their excuse was they didn't know the game. My reply was to point out that knowing the game had to do with memory and pattern recognition. I got told to shut up.
Since then, numerous studies have been done proving all those things and more can be gained or improved upon by playing video games. I have seen first hand, through my son, about the memory, pattern recognition and problem solving. He is three years old and his favorite game in the world is Lego Marvel Super Heroes. He knows the names of over a hundred of the characters and can correctly pronounce about ninety of them. He knows what symbols on the screen represent the need for what type of hero, remembers who has what powers, who flies and who doesn't. And if there is some mechanism that he has seen work in an area before he knows what needs to be done every time he gets back to that area.
Plus, video games have been used as rehabilitative tools for people with a wide variety of mental and physical disabilities. Is there the potential for great evil in our world due to video games? Yes, but the same could be true of any tool. The evil comes not from the tool itself but from how and when it is used. It would be more accurate to say bad parenting is the bane of modern society.
Don't know what I am talking about? Perhaps you don't have a child above the age of ten in your house. Or maybe you don't own a gaming console. As the name implies most of the series is about grand theft, either of or committed with cars and that's the lighter side of the game. Then there's the possibility of hooking up with prostitutes, having your way with them and then beating the tar out of them to get your money back. Although there is a main story line, the general idea is to commit as many crimes as you can possibly get away with all whilst avoiding or taking out the police.
Video games are certainly making a splash in a big way. Many of them such as the GTA series, are outselling every other form of media out there, including books, television, music and even blockbuster movies.
A lot of these games explore and even glorify the bad things that we do to one another. There are quite a few different gaming franchises where the entire purpose of the game is to murder a bunch of other guys before they murder you. Except instead of murder its called warfare. Semantics.
Are these games ruining the moral fiber of our country? I don't think so. I think it is the parents that allow their children to play these games that are damaging our country. And the problem isn't even the fact that they let them play the games. The problem is that they let the video games do the parenting, instead of teaching their kids between right and wrong.
Many young kids and teenagers today have such a screwed up moral compass because the only moral lessons they have received is murder, maim or mess up the other guy, before he can do it to you. Video games are just tools. While primarily designed solely for entertainment purposes, if there is no other source of teaching, they will teach the morals and ideas that are within them.
If however, we, as parents, teach our children right from wrong, how to tell the difference between the good guys and the bad guys, and that we want to be the good guys and then don't let our kids play the games that have all of those potential "bad" lessons until they have shown through their way of being that they are on the "right" path, then any game, no matter how violent or morally questionable goes back to simply being a way of blowing off steam. It becomes just a fun thing to imagine, but something we would never do in real life.
When I was a kid, I used to tell my parents that video games had a large range of potential positive effects, things like, improving my memory, teaching pattern recognition, improved creative problem solving and increased hand to eye coordination. They, of course didn't believe me. But when we played the same games I always beat them. Their excuse was they didn't know the game. My reply was to point out that knowing the game had to do with memory and pattern recognition. I got told to shut up.
Since then, numerous studies have been done proving all those things and more can be gained or improved upon by playing video games. I have seen first hand, through my son, about the memory, pattern recognition and problem solving. He is three years old and his favorite game in the world is Lego Marvel Super Heroes. He knows the names of over a hundred of the characters and can correctly pronounce about ninety of them. He knows what symbols on the screen represent the need for what type of hero, remembers who has what powers, who flies and who doesn't. And if there is some mechanism that he has seen work in an area before he knows what needs to be done every time he gets back to that area.
Plus, video games have been used as rehabilitative tools for people with a wide variety of mental and physical disabilities. Is there the potential for great evil in our world due to video games? Yes, but the same could be true of any tool. The evil comes not from the tool itself but from how and when it is used. It would be more accurate to say bad parenting is the bane of modern society.
Sunday, May 25, 2014
As American as...
We were out having dinner the other night at our favorite pizza joint. There was plenty of pizza and garlic rolls for all. While we were there chomping away, I couldn't help but hear part of a conversation at one of the nearby tables.
This guy was talking about the pizza and he was saying that it was good, but it wasn't real Italian pizza. If you want real Italian pizza you have to go to this other place that he knew about. I had a very hard time keeping my mouth shut and not getting into an argument with this fellow.
For starters where we were is literally my favorite place to go out and get a pizza. It is the only pizza-rant that I have gone to more than once in the last twenty years. And second, pizza isn't Italian. The real origins of pizza would have to be either from the Indians, Persians, Greeks or Egyptians. And while yes, it was popularized here in America, by the Italians, pizza in the form that we know of it today, the pizza that is sold by places like Pizza Hut, Domino's, Papa John's and many other lesser known family owned restaurants is 100% American. "Real" Italian pizza exists. It just isn't typically what gets eaten here in America.
This got me thinking. The pizza thing was a claim to something being Italian. But what about other things that people like to claim are American?What about apple pie? That's American right? Nope not at all. I mean it may be pretty common in a lot of American households at a lot of different functions but there weren't apples here until the Europeans brought them. Once the colonists did have apples, they quickly became a part of their everyday breakfast routine, but as apple cider, not pie. An officially American pie would have to be something like strawberry or blueberry since both of those are native to the U.S.
As American as Rock & Roll. Rock and Roll is an American invention. It sprung up out of the jazz and blues music that we had at the end of the forties and early fifties. Others heard what we had, added their own flavor to it and played it back to us. We liked what they were doing and were inspired to tweak and twist it even more. There is no doubt that creativity and innovation led to many other countries contributing greatly to rock music. But Rock & Roll started here.
As American as baseball. Now that's kind of a tricky one because just like with pizza there are many different games that could be called the progenitor of baseball, many similar games from many different countries. However, the game that we all recognize today had its rules written in 1845 by a man named Alexander Cartwright. He wrote the rules for a New York City "base ball" club called the Knickerbockers
We take a lot of these phrases for granted. We just accept that x or y thing is American simply because there is an American version of it. Or just because a few million people before us claimed that these things are American. The truth is seldom cut and dried. Its not black and white. For a lot of these things there is an American way of doing it and then there are the ways that others do it.
For example football is an American sport. It is similar to soccer, but different. Is it an evolved form of the same game? Or a different game entirely? People on the whole tend to be arrogant. They each believe that the version of a thing that they are familiar with, the one they grew up with, the one they prefer, is the right or real version. All others are wrong or fake.
Who is right and who is not?
This guy was talking about the pizza and he was saying that it was good, but it wasn't real Italian pizza. If you want real Italian pizza you have to go to this other place that he knew about. I had a very hard time keeping my mouth shut and not getting into an argument with this fellow.
For starters where we were is literally my favorite place to go out and get a pizza. It is the only pizza-rant that I have gone to more than once in the last twenty years. And second, pizza isn't Italian. The real origins of pizza would have to be either from the Indians, Persians, Greeks or Egyptians. And while yes, it was popularized here in America, by the Italians, pizza in the form that we know of it today, the pizza that is sold by places like Pizza Hut, Domino's, Papa John's and many other lesser known family owned restaurants is 100% American. "Real" Italian pizza exists. It just isn't typically what gets eaten here in America.
This got me thinking. The pizza thing was a claim to something being Italian. But what about other things that people like to claim are American?What about apple pie? That's American right? Nope not at all. I mean it may be pretty common in a lot of American households at a lot of different functions but there weren't apples here until the Europeans brought them. Once the colonists did have apples, they quickly became a part of their everyday breakfast routine, but as apple cider, not pie. An officially American pie would have to be something like strawberry or blueberry since both of those are native to the U.S.
As American as Rock & Roll. Rock and Roll is an American invention. It sprung up out of the jazz and blues music that we had at the end of the forties and early fifties. Others heard what we had, added their own flavor to it and played it back to us. We liked what they were doing and were inspired to tweak and twist it even more. There is no doubt that creativity and innovation led to many other countries contributing greatly to rock music. But Rock & Roll started here.
As American as baseball. Now that's kind of a tricky one because just like with pizza there are many different games that could be called the progenitor of baseball, many similar games from many different countries. However, the game that we all recognize today had its rules written in 1845 by a man named Alexander Cartwright. He wrote the rules for a New York City "base ball" club called the Knickerbockers
We take a lot of these phrases for granted. We just accept that x or y thing is American simply because there is an American version of it. Or just because a few million people before us claimed that these things are American. The truth is seldom cut and dried. Its not black and white. For a lot of these things there is an American way of doing it and then there are the ways that others do it.
For example football is an American sport. It is similar to soccer, but different. Is it an evolved form of the same game? Or a different game entirely? People on the whole tend to be arrogant. They each believe that the version of a thing that they are familiar with, the one they grew up with, the one they prefer, is the right or real version. All others are wrong or fake.
Who is right and who is not?
Friday, May 23, 2014
Stress. Confusion. Chaos. Rushing. Mistakes. Or be early
Back in 2001, I used to do telephone technical support for a living. I worked for the company that handled all of the support calls for Gateway computers. To me, it was very rewarding work. I enjoy being able to provide a useful service to others and got great pleasure out of being able to talk people through the process of troubleshooting and when necessary replacing hardware.
The shifts were thirteen hours long and we worked 3.5 days a week. The people working the early part of the week got the early part of the half day and those working the latter half of the week got the second half of the split day. The changeover was often stressful for many because there was really no overlap. One shift ended exactly when the next shift was supposed to start. If the second shift person was late showing up, the first person didn't get to go home on time. We were "required" to show up for our shift fifteen minutes before it started, but very few people ever did.
Even on the other days of the week it was often chaotic, with people showing up at the last possible minute, or worse yet ten or more minutes late. There was nearly always tons of stress and frantic activity with people constantly rushing around. Frequently there were accidents in our parking lot or on the streets within just a couple of blocks of the office.
People that are always in a rush, make more mistakes. They tend to get in more accidents, are more stressed out and generally have a hard time handling many of the simplest things. I don't believe in rushing for anything, unless it is a real and absolute emergency. Things like blood, fire, and birth, those are reasons to rush. Anything else is just not worth the trouble overall.
Does this mean that I was one of those people that was always late, causing stress and chaos for myself and others? On the contrary, I would always show up for my shift one hour early. I am not talking about getting up and getting ready to go to work an hour before I had to be there. And I am not talking about leaving my house and going to pick up my buddy that worked with me an hour before my shift started. I mean I managed my time in such a way that I arrived at my job one hour before my shift started every single day that I worked, like clockwork,
In eighteen months, I was never late once. My partner on the other side of the week was always relieved to see me because whoever it was knew they would get to home on time. My boss was happy because she never had to wonder if I was going to show up on time. The other employees on my team knew they could always count on me to be there and ready to rock when our shift started.
There was always time for me to get my computer set up, open up all the browsers that I needed for all the separate screens of data I needed access to, plenty of time to make sure all our databases were working. I had time to check the stats for our call center to see how busy it had been or was expected to be. There was more than enough time to make sure I had a drink and a snack at my desk for when I got hungry or thirsty during the day. All necessary last minute bathroom functions could be handled.
In short, because of my habit of arriving much earlier than I was required to or absolutely needed to, while others around my were floundering around in a sea of chaos, I was able to remain calm and relaxed and handle things clearly and concisely. You could make up whatever excuses you want to about why getting to work an hour early for your shift doesn't or couldn't work, but who would you rather be more like? Me calm, peaceful and relaxed, or all the other people frantically scrambling and rushing around, nervous and stressed out? It is your choice.
The shifts were thirteen hours long and we worked 3.5 days a week. The people working the early part of the week got the early part of the half day and those working the latter half of the week got the second half of the split day. The changeover was often stressful for many because there was really no overlap. One shift ended exactly when the next shift was supposed to start. If the second shift person was late showing up, the first person didn't get to go home on time. We were "required" to show up for our shift fifteen minutes before it started, but very few people ever did.
Even on the other days of the week it was often chaotic, with people showing up at the last possible minute, or worse yet ten or more minutes late. There was nearly always tons of stress and frantic activity with people constantly rushing around. Frequently there were accidents in our parking lot or on the streets within just a couple of blocks of the office.
People that are always in a rush, make more mistakes. They tend to get in more accidents, are more stressed out and generally have a hard time handling many of the simplest things. I don't believe in rushing for anything, unless it is a real and absolute emergency. Things like blood, fire, and birth, those are reasons to rush. Anything else is just not worth the trouble overall.
Does this mean that I was one of those people that was always late, causing stress and chaos for myself and others? On the contrary, I would always show up for my shift one hour early. I am not talking about getting up and getting ready to go to work an hour before I had to be there. And I am not talking about leaving my house and going to pick up my buddy that worked with me an hour before my shift started. I mean I managed my time in such a way that I arrived at my job one hour before my shift started every single day that I worked, like clockwork,
In eighteen months, I was never late once. My partner on the other side of the week was always relieved to see me because whoever it was knew they would get to home on time. My boss was happy because she never had to wonder if I was going to show up on time. The other employees on my team knew they could always count on me to be there and ready to rock when our shift started.
There was always time for me to get my computer set up, open up all the browsers that I needed for all the separate screens of data I needed access to, plenty of time to make sure all our databases were working. I had time to check the stats for our call center to see how busy it had been or was expected to be. There was more than enough time to make sure I had a drink and a snack at my desk for when I got hungry or thirsty during the day. All necessary last minute bathroom functions could be handled.
In short, because of my habit of arriving much earlier than I was required to or absolutely needed to, while others around my were floundering around in a sea of chaos, I was able to remain calm and relaxed and handle things clearly and concisely. You could make up whatever excuses you want to about why getting to work an hour early for your shift doesn't or couldn't work, but who would you rather be more like? Me calm, peaceful and relaxed, or all the other people frantically scrambling and rushing around, nervous and stressed out? It is your choice.
Wednesday, May 21, 2014
How is not important
In a lot of my previous work, I discuss plans and vision. There is talk, at length, about the fact that there needs to be a specific plan to get you from where you are to where you want to be. It is mentioned that without such a plan you are doomed to repeat all the things that you have done up until this point, for the rest of your life.
From all this, one could easily get the impression that I believe you should be micromanaging every hour of every day and how it gets done. That how every single little thing gets done should be planned out ahead of time to the last detail. That there should be a vision of the way everything is done and that everything must be done exactly according to that vision.
This could not be farther from the truth. In fact such micro-management leads to insanity. It leads to a person becoming a completely obsessive control freak. Let me show you what I mean.
When I was younger, I lived under the thumb of my stepfather. From my perspective at least, I could never do anything to his satisfaction. And for a long time the things that happened simply boggled my mind.
He DID have an exact method by which he wanted everything done. My natural inclination was to do things by the simplest most efficient methods. We obviously grew up very differently because my way and his way were never the same. Doing things his way often seemed like the thing itself was a punishment. It would take longer, use more resources and quite often produce a lower quality result than the way that I was used to doing things.
I would do things my way. He would get mad at me and ask me why I didn't do things the way he wanted them done. But anything I responded with that wasn't me agreeing with him about his way being better either got ignored or got me disciplined.
Sometimes he would ask if I did what he asked and when I said I did, things seemed to be okay for awhile, until he queried whether or not I had done them his way. Then all hell would break loose. It was always his way or the highway, with no quarter given.
Let me ask you this. If your plan involves becoming the owner of a yacht, and a deceased relative wills you one just like the one you would have bought for yourself, should you sink it and go about getting the boat "your" way? Would you do that? Of course not. That would be insane.
You may intend to get wealthy by writing the next great American novel. But if what happens instead is a penny stock that you invested in suddenly becomes a Fortune 500 company and you find yourself swimming in money, why be upset about it? Just quit your job and enjoy the new freedom. If you want to, you can still invest the time and energy to become a bestselling author, but now you don't have to.
We all have a vision of the way things are going to be or the way they should be. But the bottom line is the result. As long as what you are doing is morally and legally sound, who cares how things get done? What matters is that it gets done and that you are happy with the quality of the result. Don't be attached to the image you have in your head of how things will happen. Because most of the time, that image is wrong.
Specific things do have to happen in order for your life to be the way you want it to be. Exactly how they happen is really not important. Let go of the image. Become attached to the results. Or as I like to say, function over form. Screw the details.
From all this, one could easily get the impression that I believe you should be micromanaging every hour of every day and how it gets done. That how every single little thing gets done should be planned out ahead of time to the last detail. That there should be a vision of the way everything is done and that everything must be done exactly according to that vision.
This could not be farther from the truth. In fact such micro-management leads to insanity. It leads to a person becoming a completely obsessive control freak. Let me show you what I mean.
When I was younger, I lived under the thumb of my stepfather. From my perspective at least, I could never do anything to his satisfaction. And for a long time the things that happened simply boggled my mind.
He DID have an exact method by which he wanted everything done. My natural inclination was to do things by the simplest most efficient methods. We obviously grew up very differently because my way and his way were never the same. Doing things his way often seemed like the thing itself was a punishment. It would take longer, use more resources and quite often produce a lower quality result than the way that I was used to doing things.
I would do things my way. He would get mad at me and ask me why I didn't do things the way he wanted them done. But anything I responded with that wasn't me agreeing with him about his way being better either got ignored or got me disciplined.
Sometimes he would ask if I did what he asked and when I said I did, things seemed to be okay for awhile, until he queried whether or not I had done them his way. Then all hell would break loose. It was always his way or the highway, with no quarter given.
Let me ask you this. If your plan involves becoming the owner of a yacht, and a deceased relative wills you one just like the one you would have bought for yourself, should you sink it and go about getting the boat "your" way? Would you do that? Of course not. That would be insane.
You may intend to get wealthy by writing the next great American novel. But if what happens instead is a penny stock that you invested in suddenly becomes a Fortune 500 company and you find yourself swimming in money, why be upset about it? Just quit your job and enjoy the new freedom. If you want to, you can still invest the time and energy to become a bestselling author, but now you don't have to.
We all have a vision of the way things are going to be or the way they should be. But the bottom line is the result. As long as what you are doing is morally and legally sound, who cares how things get done? What matters is that it gets done and that you are happy with the quality of the result. Don't be attached to the image you have in your head of how things will happen. Because most of the time, that image is wrong.
Specific things do have to happen in order for your life to be the way you want it to be. Exactly how they happen is really not important. Let go of the image. Become attached to the results. Or as I like to say, function over form. Screw the details.
Are we training our kids to become weaker?
Have you ever heard some old timer make some crazy claim about how things were in the old days? They say things like, back in my day, there was no school bus. We had to walk. Everyday. Through the sleet and the snow. Five miles. Up hill. Both ways.
That last part is of course ridiculous. There's no way it could be uphill both ways unless the school building physically moved while you were in it, or your house did. At least half of the trip was easy because it was mostly downhill and precipitation doesn't fall from the sky EVERY day. While it is an exaggeration. It does go to show that we do take a lot of things for granted. Life did used to be harder without all of our modern conveniences.
And George Carlin, rest his soul, used to say we were turning our nation into a bunch of wimps(his word was less kid friendly) due to preemptively rescuing our loved ones from bad situations. He would say, in the old days, parents would purposely bring their healthy kids in contact with sick ones that way they could get sick and their immune systems could get stronger. Kids would learn how to defend themselves, either diplomatically or physically by getting into fights. Now we break things up before they get that far and kids never learn to deal with these situations.
I used to think that what he was saying was funny, but nonsense. But, now, I wonder. When it comes to working, I have seen evidence of the current generation being a whole lot more fragile than the previous one was. While we don't associate with him anymore, we used to know this kid. He was kinda young, I think maybe twenty at the time. He still lived at home with his parents. And he used to come home from his job and complain to one of us that because his manager was working that day he had to stay on his feet for half of his entire shift. He was in so much pain and he suffered for soooo long!
Was he busting his back working construction or maybe sweating it out in the hot Florida sun as a roofer? Nope. He was busy peddling novelty items at Spencer's, in the local mall. And the best part? Was he working for 18hours? 16? 12 maybe? None of the above. His shift was four hours. He was complaining about his body being beaten up over having to stand for a grand total of two hours.
We currently live with another youngster who has been part of the work force for about ten years now. But for around seven of those years he has only worked four to five hours at a time. He has just started getting longer shifts, like eight to nine hours and he has spent some time going on and on about how much time he spends on his feet, about how his back hurts and he is working all these long hours.
Most of the rest of us living in the house together have at one time or another worked a great deal longer than that and quite often doing real back breaking work. To most of us eight hours is a short shift.
When I was around the age of the guys I've mentioned here, I worked construction eighteen hours a day, six days a week, for six months. My back and feet and leg muscles used to hurt so much, I would have to take pain medication just so that I could relax enough to fall asleep, in order to get up and start it all over the next day. Four of us used to do telephone technical support for thirteen and a half hours a day, three to five days a week(depending on overtime). During several of the hurricanes that we have had down here in Florida, a couple of us have worked more than twenty four hours with no breaks. So, we really have no sympathy for the newer generation of workers
If George Carlin and the other old timers that say we are destroying our country by coddling ourselves are wrong, then why is it that many of us that have been part of the work force for ten years or less seem to find actual labor so much harder than those of us that have been around for so much longer?
That last part is of course ridiculous. There's no way it could be uphill both ways unless the school building physically moved while you were in it, or your house did. At least half of the trip was easy because it was mostly downhill and precipitation doesn't fall from the sky EVERY day. While it is an exaggeration. It does go to show that we do take a lot of things for granted. Life did used to be harder without all of our modern conveniences.
And George Carlin, rest his soul, used to say we were turning our nation into a bunch of wimps(his word was less kid friendly) due to preemptively rescuing our loved ones from bad situations. He would say, in the old days, parents would purposely bring their healthy kids in contact with sick ones that way they could get sick and their immune systems could get stronger. Kids would learn how to defend themselves, either diplomatically or physically by getting into fights. Now we break things up before they get that far and kids never learn to deal with these situations.
I used to think that what he was saying was funny, but nonsense. But, now, I wonder. When it comes to working, I have seen evidence of the current generation being a whole lot more fragile than the previous one was. While we don't associate with him anymore, we used to know this kid. He was kinda young, I think maybe twenty at the time. He still lived at home with his parents. And he used to come home from his job and complain to one of us that because his manager was working that day he had to stay on his feet for half of his entire shift. He was in so much pain and he suffered for soooo long!
Was he busting his back working construction or maybe sweating it out in the hot Florida sun as a roofer? Nope. He was busy peddling novelty items at Spencer's, in the local mall. And the best part? Was he working for 18hours? 16? 12 maybe? None of the above. His shift was four hours. He was complaining about his body being beaten up over having to stand for a grand total of two hours.
We currently live with another youngster who has been part of the work force for about ten years now. But for around seven of those years he has only worked four to five hours at a time. He has just started getting longer shifts, like eight to nine hours and he has spent some time going on and on about how much time he spends on his feet, about how his back hurts and he is working all these long hours.
Most of the rest of us living in the house together have at one time or another worked a great deal longer than that and quite often doing real back breaking work. To most of us eight hours is a short shift.
When I was around the age of the guys I've mentioned here, I worked construction eighteen hours a day, six days a week, for six months. My back and feet and leg muscles used to hurt so much, I would have to take pain medication just so that I could relax enough to fall asleep, in order to get up and start it all over the next day. Four of us used to do telephone technical support for thirteen and a half hours a day, three to five days a week(depending on overtime). During several of the hurricanes that we have had down here in Florida, a couple of us have worked more than twenty four hours with no breaks. So, we really have no sympathy for the newer generation of workers
If George Carlin and the other old timers that say we are destroying our country by coddling ourselves are wrong, then why is it that many of us that have been part of the work force for ten years or less seem to find actual labor so much harder than those of us that have been around for so much longer?
Where have I been lately?
A lot of people get sick, a lot. They spend maybe a quarter of their lives dealing with one symptom or another. There's coughing, sneezing, dizziness, runny noses, headaches, sore throats, congestion, drowsiness, ear aches, excessive phlegm buildups, overall aches and pains and lethargy, just to name a few. There are a whole lot more. Those are just the ones that sprang immediately to mind.
Most of my life, I have had a pretty strong immune system. When other people around me would get really really sick, I would just end up with minor sniffles or maybe a cough here or there. They would be dropping like flies and I would be there just plugging along as if nothing was wrong.
Maybe my immune system is stronger than the average human's because I am really an alien/demon/angel. Or maybe it has something to do with them pumping my system full of antibiotics, when I drowned and was in a coma, when I was still a toddler.
I did manage to discover through my childhood and teenage years, that my kryptonite is strep throat. When that thing comes around, I get it every time, or so it seems. And it seems to last longer for me than it does for other people. Thinking back, I've only really gotten that about twice in the last ten years though.
For awhile now, I haven't really gotten sick the way most people think of illness. I was starting to think that maybe I was evolving and had become immune to most of the maladies that plague us. But, after doing some more thinking and observing general patterns over the last few years, I have recognized some changes that seem to coincide with times that most others around me have gotten sick.
When other people around me are suffering through half a dozen or more symptoms I usually do not have any of them. But that's not to say I get away entirely unscathed. I have found when they are hacking and sneezing and whining about how bad they feel, that I am often more tired and occasionally feel slightly dumb. Now this for me is a really big deal because I am usually very sharp and great at handling problems. This lessening of my intelligence frustrates me greatly. I end up feeling like a complete vegetable because things that are usually simple for me to solve are either impossible or just not worth the effort.
I don't want to be present while this is occurring but there is very little I can do to get away from it. Plus, I'm tired. So, I sleep. Normally I sleep a few hours more than usual for a day or two and that's that. This past week, I've spent more time asleep than awake, which is why there has been no new blogging from me until now. I intend to rectify that starting now.
I think what has been happening for the past few years is that my immune system has been getting stronger. It has grown to the point where it is able to successfully fight off whatever illnesses are destroying the daily quality of life for my friends and loved ones. But, it uses up all or nearly all of the energy that I would use to go about being my usual awesome self.
Is it really a boon or a detriment though? To all the people regularly dealing with the laundry list of symptoms I mentioned up at the top I am sure it would be a gift. Myself, I'm not so sure. I mean I know I don't want to be plagued by all those common cold type symptoms. But sleeping more means missing more of life. And I kinda totally love life.
Most of my life, I have had a pretty strong immune system. When other people around me would get really really sick, I would just end up with minor sniffles or maybe a cough here or there. They would be dropping like flies and I would be there just plugging along as if nothing was wrong.
Maybe my immune system is stronger than the average human's because I am really an alien/demon/angel. Or maybe it has something to do with them pumping my system full of antibiotics, when I drowned and was in a coma, when I was still a toddler.
I did manage to discover through my childhood and teenage years, that my kryptonite is strep throat. When that thing comes around, I get it every time, or so it seems. And it seems to last longer for me than it does for other people. Thinking back, I've only really gotten that about twice in the last ten years though.
For awhile now, I haven't really gotten sick the way most people think of illness. I was starting to think that maybe I was evolving and had become immune to most of the maladies that plague us. But, after doing some more thinking and observing general patterns over the last few years, I have recognized some changes that seem to coincide with times that most others around me have gotten sick.
When other people around me are suffering through half a dozen or more symptoms I usually do not have any of them. But that's not to say I get away entirely unscathed. I have found when they are hacking and sneezing and whining about how bad they feel, that I am often more tired and occasionally feel slightly dumb. Now this for me is a really big deal because I am usually very sharp and great at handling problems. This lessening of my intelligence frustrates me greatly. I end up feeling like a complete vegetable because things that are usually simple for me to solve are either impossible or just not worth the effort.
I don't want to be present while this is occurring but there is very little I can do to get away from it. Plus, I'm tired. So, I sleep. Normally I sleep a few hours more than usual for a day or two and that's that. This past week, I've spent more time asleep than awake, which is why there has been no new blogging from me until now. I intend to rectify that starting now.
I think what has been happening for the past few years is that my immune system has been getting stronger. It has grown to the point where it is able to successfully fight off whatever illnesses are destroying the daily quality of life for my friends and loved ones. But, it uses up all or nearly all of the energy that I would use to go about being my usual awesome self.
Is it really a boon or a detriment though? To all the people regularly dealing with the laundry list of symptoms I mentioned up at the top I am sure it would be a gift. Myself, I'm not so sure. I mean I know I don't want to be plagued by all those common cold type symptoms. But sleeping more means missing more of life. And I kinda totally love life.
Monday, May 12, 2014
Why bother with life?
We all start life with nothing. We work our tails off to carve our way through the jungles of life. We struggle and claw and fight for every gain. Some of us manage to build vast empires of metal and stone. With our sweat and blood we build a legacy of wealth and prosperity that will hold for generations. Others of us make barely enough to survive, much less save or prepare for the future. Most of the rest of us live somewhere in the middle of those two extremes.
But, life is a zero sum game. We start with nothing and we return to the earth with nothing. Nobody gets out alive. And you can't take "it" with you.
So what's the point? If all of your hard work and time spent aren't going to matter once you are gone, why do it? Why put in the effort? Why struggle? Why don't you just coast along with no effort whatsoever and let the waters of life just buffet you around randomly from shore to shore. Why not just follow the routine, with no plan at all? You could just do the minimum that is required of you to get by and follow the same path day in and day out until your body crumbles to dust.
You could do that. In fact many people do. But all those people, they aren't really living. They are just getting by and none of them are truly happy with what they have. They are just cogs in the great machine turning the wheel of ages. Days blurred to weeks, weeks blurred to months and years. Years blurred to decades until Death comes to collect them.
All those countless lives are wasted because people fail to understand and accept that the whole point of life is now. From the time we are born until the time we die, we are blessed with billions of nows. Each one is an infinitesimally small fraction of forever. Each is unique and unlike any other now that will ever occur.
Every moment that passes brings with it a new now. And the only now that ever truly matters is the current one. The old ones are gone and the future ones have yet to come. In order to live a happy fulfilling life, you get to learn to get the most you possibly can out of the current now. We can learn from past nows and prepare for future nows, but the only one we can live is the current now.
And that my friends is why we bother, why we plan and struggle and work and play. Most of the struggle is to make our future nows more enjoyable. But as far as grading our life on the whole, it is not the one now at the end of our life that is important. It is all of them collectively. Some nows will be better than others as no life is ever perfect all the time. But from my point of view a life well lived is one with more good nows than bad.
It is a delicate balance, between planning for the future and enjoying the present, but as I see it, it is the only life worth living.
But, life is a zero sum game. We start with nothing and we return to the earth with nothing. Nobody gets out alive. And you can't take "it" with you.
So what's the point? If all of your hard work and time spent aren't going to matter once you are gone, why do it? Why put in the effort? Why struggle? Why don't you just coast along with no effort whatsoever and let the waters of life just buffet you around randomly from shore to shore. Why not just follow the routine, with no plan at all? You could just do the minimum that is required of you to get by and follow the same path day in and day out until your body crumbles to dust.
You could do that. In fact many people do. But all those people, they aren't really living. They are just getting by and none of them are truly happy with what they have. They are just cogs in the great machine turning the wheel of ages. Days blurred to weeks, weeks blurred to months and years. Years blurred to decades until Death comes to collect them.
All those countless lives are wasted because people fail to understand and accept that the whole point of life is now. From the time we are born until the time we die, we are blessed with billions of nows. Each one is an infinitesimally small fraction of forever. Each is unique and unlike any other now that will ever occur.
Every moment that passes brings with it a new now. And the only now that ever truly matters is the current one. The old ones are gone and the future ones have yet to come. In order to live a happy fulfilling life, you get to learn to get the most you possibly can out of the current now. We can learn from past nows and prepare for future nows, but the only one we can live is the current now.
And that my friends is why we bother, why we plan and struggle and work and play. Most of the struggle is to make our future nows more enjoyable. But as far as grading our life on the whole, it is not the one now at the end of our life that is important. It is all of them collectively. Some nows will be better than others as no life is ever perfect all the time. But from my point of view a life well lived is one with more good nows than bad.
It is a delicate balance, between planning for the future and enjoying the present, but as I see it, it is the only life worth living.
How does one stick to the plan?
In order to get what we want out of life we need a plan. We get to look at what we have compare it to what we want and then build an action plan, a bridge, if you will, between the two. It starts out as just an outline. But, once this is done we can flesh it out into a specific step by step manual to get from where we are to where we want to be.
Now assuming we follow this blueprint, we will eventually get to where it is that we want to be. It may take us years though. Life is chock full of distractions, shiny things, bells and whistles that tend to pull our minds away from the important hard work that we need to do if we are ever to truly succeed. So, how do we keep ourselves motivated to stay on track and work the plan?
Living our vision is one way. Treat the future as if it is already here. Imagine what life will be like once all the pieces of the puzzle have been fitted into place where they belong. Live with the joy and gratitude of your success, even though it is not yet yours. Constantly remind yourself of the fruits of your labor even though the tree is not ripe yet. You have set things in motion and the harvest will come.
For some that alone is enough. For others who don't understand that line of reasoning or who just need more than promises of the future, there is another way. As they say, all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. So how to handle this? I have a story that illustrates it rather well I think.
A couple of decades ago I took Tae Kwon Do. The school that I went to was pretty big. There were new people joining all the time and something was constantly going on. At every class they gave out certificates and they gave them out for a variety of things, most of which, at the time, I thought were pretty frivolous. There were certificates for the most improvement over the last month, for who was the most energetic, who kicked the highest, most impressive ki shout, for successful board breaking and highest kicks. There was a certificate for just about every single thing that got done in class.
Also the belt system at this school was pretty intricate. There were I think nine belts between white and black and each had between 2 and 7 stripes with 5 to 6 being the average. Now, if you don't know, stripes are kind of an intermediate point between one belt and another. They mark you as past beginner at that belt level but not yet having mastered all you need to know. A lot of schools don't use the stripe system at all. Even the ones that do usually only have one or two stripes between belts.
But between certificates, stripes and several other things that this school did, each student hardly ever went more than a week or two without some pretty major recognition. It seemed like everyone was constantly being rewarded for whatever it was they did, no matter how small.
At the time, I thought it was pretty stupid. I mean if people are doing exactly what it is that is expected of them why are they being rewarded? Shouldn't things like that be reserved for people that are going above and beyond what is required and expected?
I didn't see, at the time, what was really happening. The goal of becoming a black belt was years away for any new people just coming to class. Even going from one belt to another was a process that took weeks if not months of hard work. All the little back patting and mini rewards kept people motivated and on track. It kept them coming back week after week until they actually achieved the ultimate goal.
You can use the same tools with the action plan for your life. Go over the blueprint for your life. . Think of the major accomplishments in your blueprint as belt levels, each one signifying a huge step towards the achievements of your goals. At each one of these points set up a reward for yourself, some way of congratulating yourself and motivating you to continue on the path. Split each "belt" into "stripes" and at each minor accomplishment have some lesser reward, to show that the work is all worth it and that you are on track. And regularly give yourself "certificates" or little pats on the back every few days.
None of these rewards need to be lavish or exorbitant, but they should be things that you truly enjoy. They are things that you deserve for working towards your long term goals. If you treat following the path towards your goals as an enjoyable service with rewards all along the path, holding out until the final goal has been reached will be something that you love doing, something that you want, rather than something you are forcing yourself to do. The bells and whistles will not be shiny or loud. The distractions will not pull you away.
Stay the course. Have the life you really want.
Now assuming we follow this blueprint, we will eventually get to where it is that we want to be. It may take us years though. Life is chock full of distractions, shiny things, bells and whistles that tend to pull our minds away from the important hard work that we need to do if we are ever to truly succeed. So, how do we keep ourselves motivated to stay on track and work the plan?
Living our vision is one way. Treat the future as if it is already here. Imagine what life will be like once all the pieces of the puzzle have been fitted into place where they belong. Live with the joy and gratitude of your success, even though it is not yet yours. Constantly remind yourself of the fruits of your labor even though the tree is not ripe yet. You have set things in motion and the harvest will come.
For some that alone is enough. For others who don't understand that line of reasoning or who just need more than promises of the future, there is another way. As they say, all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. So how to handle this? I have a story that illustrates it rather well I think.
A couple of decades ago I took Tae Kwon Do. The school that I went to was pretty big. There were new people joining all the time and something was constantly going on. At every class they gave out certificates and they gave them out for a variety of things, most of which, at the time, I thought were pretty frivolous. There were certificates for the most improvement over the last month, for who was the most energetic, who kicked the highest, most impressive ki shout, for successful board breaking and highest kicks. There was a certificate for just about every single thing that got done in class.
Also the belt system at this school was pretty intricate. There were I think nine belts between white and black and each had between 2 and 7 stripes with 5 to 6 being the average. Now, if you don't know, stripes are kind of an intermediate point between one belt and another. They mark you as past beginner at that belt level but not yet having mastered all you need to know. A lot of schools don't use the stripe system at all. Even the ones that do usually only have one or two stripes between belts.
But between certificates, stripes and several other things that this school did, each student hardly ever went more than a week or two without some pretty major recognition. It seemed like everyone was constantly being rewarded for whatever it was they did, no matter how small.
At the time, I thought it was pretty stupid. I mean if people are doing exactly what it is that is expected of them why are they being rewarded? Shouldn't things like that be reserved for people that are going above and beyond what is required and expected?
I didn't see, at the time, what was really happening. The goal of becoming a black belt was years away for any new people just coming to class. Even going from one belt to another was a process that took weeks if not months of hard work. All the little back patting and mini rewards kept people motivated and on track. It kept them coming back week after week until they actually achieved the ultimate goal.
You can use the same tools with the action plan for your life. Go over the blueprint for your life. . Think of the major accomplishments in your blueprint as belt levels, each one signifying a huge step towards the achievements of your goals. At each one of these points set up a reward for yourself, some way of congratulating yourself and motivating you to continue on the path. Split each "belt" into "stripes" and at each minor accomplishment have some lesser reward, to show that the work is all worth it and that you are on track. And regularly give yourself "certificates" or little pats on the back every few days.
None of these rewards need to be lavish or exorbitant, but they should be things that you truly enjoy. They are things that you deserve for working towards your long term goals. If you treat following the path towards your goals as an enjoyable service with rewards all along the path, holding out until the final goal has been reached will be something that you love doing, something that you want, rather than something you are forcing yourself to do. The bells and whistles will not be shiny or loud. The distractions will not pull you away.
Stay the course. Have the life you really want.
Wednesday, May 7, 2014
Why are you where you are?
Our parents say it to us all the time as we are growing up. Its in movies and books everywhere. They say it in most commencement speeches. You can be anything you want to be. You can go anywhere you want to go. You can do anything you want to do. The sky is the limit, anything you set your mind to you can accomplish.
Those words aren't just empty platitudes. They are truth itself. Yet, how many of us are who we really want to be, are where we want to be and do what it is that we want to do? Very few, if any. There lies before us a world of infinite possibilities, countless open doors. Why do we not simply walk through them and change our lives forever, for the better?
Most of our lives are filled with other people's junk. Things that we really have no interest in and really don't know what to do with. There are the desires of our parents, pushing us towards the lives they either have or weren't able to have. There's our well meaning but often misinformed friends guiding us towards their idea of a perfect life. Teachers, guidance counselors, other family members all telling us what we should do and filling our lives with the things that they want for us. Many of those things aren't ever going to work for us, even though they come with the greatest love and best intentions. But, from the ideas that will work for us why can't we cobble together the perfect life from the bits and pieces of all the things they shove our way?
We try. We take the parts that seem like good ideas and we make them part of our life, but more often than not we aren't happy with the results. Why is this? Each of these people that love and care about us are sharing with us their vision of who we are and who we could be. The ideas and things that they suggest would work better if we were exactly who they envisioned. But we are not the people that our friends and family see us as. It simply isn't possible, because no two people see us exactly the same way
If we know thirty different people there are thirty different points of view on who and what we are. Piecing together a life from these different ideas would be like taking thirty different clips from thirty different movies about thirty different people and attempting to make one two hour movie out of the clips. It's probably doable it just wouldn't make any sense.
Some of the ideas and thoughts that our loved ones have of us are mutually exclusive, they can't exist within the same person. Some are ways that we could be but aren't. Others are things that at one time were true but aren't anymore.
So how do we get to be who it is that we want to be, live where we want to live and do what we want to do? There are clues in some sayings and cliches that have been around for centuries. Fortune favors the bold. God helps those who help themselves. The best place to find a helping hand is at the end of your own arm.
That's right. It isn't for anyone else to tell you what you want or what it is going to take to get it. In order to get what you want out of life, you get to decide, who you want to be, where you want to go, and what you want to do. Have a clear vision of exactly what your life will look like when these things are a part of your life. Search your life from the bottom up and discard all the thoughts, feelings and ideas that are holding you back, no matter who or where they come from.
You are where you are either because it is where you have decided to be or because it is where you let others decide for you to be. Take back the reins. Direct the movie you want to see. It is only your vision that can get you where you want to be, only your plans, ideas and work that will make it happen.
Those words aren't just empty platitudes. They are truth itself. Yet, how many of us are who we really want to be, are where we want to be and do what it is that we want to do? Very few, if any. There lies before us a world of infinite possibilities, countless open doors. Why do we not simply walk through them and change our lives forever, for the better?
Most of our lives are filled with other people's junk. Things that we really have no interest in and really don't know what to do with. There are the desires of our parents, pushing us towards the lives they either have or weren't able to have. There's our well meaning but often misinformed friends guiding us towards their idea of a perfect life. Teachers, guidance counselors, other family members all telling us what we should do and filling our lives with the things that they want for us. Many of those things aren't ever going to work for us, even though they come with the greatest love and best intentions. But, from the ideas that will work for us why can't we cobble together the perfect life from the bits and pieces of all the things they shove our way?
We try. We take the parts that seem like good ideas and we make them part of our life, but more often than not we aren't happy with the results. Why is this? Each of these people that love and care about us are sharing with us their vision of who we are and who we could be. The ideas and things that they suggest would work better if we were exactly who they envisioned. But we are not the people that our friends and family see us as. It simply isn't possible, because no two people see us exactly the same way
If we know thirty different people there are thirty different points of view on who and what we are. Piecing together a life from these different ideas would be like taking thirty different clips from thirty different movies about thirty different people and attempting to make one two hour movie out of the clips. It's probably doable it just wouldn't make any sense.
Some of the ideas and thoughts that our loved ones have of us are mutually exclusive, they can't exist within the same person. Some are ways that we could be but aren't. Others are things that at one time were true but aren't anymore.
So how do we get to be who it is that we want to be, live where we want to live and do what we want to do? There are clues in some sayings and cliches that have been around for centuries. Fortune favors the bold. God helps those who help themselves. The best place to find a helping hand is at the end of your own arm.
That's right. It isn't for anyone else to tell you what you want or what it is going to take to get it. In order to get what you want out of life, you get to decide, who you want to be, where you want to go, and what you want to do. Have a clear vision of exactly what your life will look like when these things are a part of your life. Search your life from the bottom up and discard all the thoughts, feelings and ideas that are holding you back, no matter who or where they come from.
You are where you are either because it is where you have decided to be or because it is where you let others decide for you to be. Take back the reins. Direct the movie you want to see. It is only your vision that can get you where you want to be, only your plans, ideas and work that will make it happen.
Monday, May 5, 2014
The right way to abuse your pets?
In case you haven't yet noticed my thoughts and ideas do not usually match those of most people in general. The reason for this is that I do not blindly accept the things that I am told. I do not take on faith the things that authority figures say. My way is to seek out the truth and let it speak for itself.
I am going to say some things that might make people a bit angry today. It is not my intention, but the truth often makes people angry. In light of the things that I am about to say, I want to be very clear. I do not hate animals. In fact, I love animals. Unlike people they are always honest. They never hide how they feel and they love unconditionally.
I have a healthy love and respect for all life. It is very easy for me to fall in love with and become attached to an animal. Now for the part that seems to make most people go nuts. I firmly believe, with very little exception, that making an animal a pet is an act of cruelty, not an act of love.
Before the flaming begins, let's talk about why I feel that way. When people think of having a pet, usually they think of the ways in which having that pet enriches their lives. They think of coming home and having the animal waiting for them, happy to see them. Or maybe they think of the fact that they are rescuing the animal from some horrible fate.
What they don't think of is all of the countless hours the animal spends suffering waiting for them to come home. The person never experiences it so why should they think of it? Animals don't really have a sense of time. You can tell them you are leaving at 7 and will be back at 5, but once you leave, all they know is that you abandoned them. They suffer all day long through the pain of loss.
Now, let's talk about environment. Over millenia of conditioning, the natural habitat for humans has become one that is almost entirely indoors. We live in buildings. The natural environment for most of the animals that we take as pets, especially the ones that are more than say 15 pounds or so, is outdoors.
Animals are not built for, nor in any way prepared for all of the indoor concerns we have. All of the messes that they create or find themselves a part of are typically things that don't exist outdoors. Outside, everywhere is the bathroom. Why should inside be any different?
Outside is a wide open environment where animals can roam freely. As messy as they may be, our homes are not wild places, filled with opportunities for tracking and hunting. Unless you live in a mansion and give your pets free reign, buildings are not places where animals can belong. Most of them want to be outside, wild and free.
Some people realize this and allow their pets to run around in their fenced in yards while they are sleeping or are not home. On the surface this seems like a good idea. It gives the animal more freedom right? Not really. They are still trapped, just now they can see all the stuff they can't get to. And what do they do when they see something they want? They either go under, over or through the fence to get to it, or make your neighbor's lives uncomfortable by loudly complaining that they can't get to it.
Every time I hear dogs barking for hours on end, it occurs to me to wonder how much their owners really must hate animals, to constantly subject them to such cruelty. Yes, the barking is unpleasant to me, but I can tune it out. The dog can't tune out how it feels about being alone and trapped. It can't ignore its sorrow.
Then there are those people who keep their animals inside in cages, in order to reduce the amount of discomfort for other people and to keep the animals from destroying things while they are gone. Yes, this does adequately handle those problems, but I cannot put words to how messed up I think that is. How can you possibly claim to care for your pet when you reduce its world down to a four foot by four foot cube?
So, while I do love animals, I do not believe, for the most part, in having pets. There are exceptions of course. Some people have their lives set up in such a way that there is always someone around to spend time with the animal or some animals that have been domesticated to the point where outside no longer holds any draw.
My personal preference, instead of having a pet, is to have friends that are animals. What I am talking about is animals that can and do take care of themselves but choose to spend time with me because they love me just as much as I love them. That way, we can have a mutual friendship, one based on love and respect and either one of us can move on when or if it becomes time to do so, instead of the master/slave relationship that most pet ownership really is.
I am going to say some things that might make people a bit angry today. It is not my intention, but the truth often makes people angry. In light of the things that I am about to say, I want to be very clear. I do not hate animals. In fact, I love animals. Unlike people they are always honest. They never hide how they feel and they love unconditionally.
I have a healthy love and respect for all life. It is very easy for me to fall in love with and become attached to an animal. Now for the part that seems to make most people go nuts. I firmly believe, with very little exception, that making an animal a pet is an act of cruelty, not an act of love.
Before the flaming begins, let's talk about why I feel that way. When people think of having a pet, usually they think of the ways in which having that pet enriches their lives. They think of coming home and having the animal waiting for them, happy to see them. Or maybe they think of the fact that they are rescuing the animal from some horrible fate.
What they don't think of is all of the countless hours the animal spends suffering waiting for them to come home. The person never experiences it so why should they think of it? Animals don't really have a sense of time. You can tell them you are leaving at 7 and will be back at 5, but once you leave, all they know is that you abandoned them. They suffer all day long through the pain of loss.
Now, let's talk about environment. Over millenia of conditioning, the natural habitat for humans has become one that is almost entirely indoors. We live in buildings. The natural environment for most of the animals that we take as pets, especially the ones that are more than say 15 pounds or so, is outdoors.
Animals are not built for, nor in any way prepared for all of the indoor concerns we have. All of the messes that they create or find themselves a part of are typically things that don't exist outdoors. Outside, everywhere is the bathroom. Why should inside be any different?
Outside is a wide open environment where animals can roam freely. As messy as they may be, our homes are not wild places, filled with opportunities for tracking and hunting. Unless you live in a mansion and give your pets free reign, buildings are not places where animals can belong. Most of them want to be outside, wild and free.
Some people realize this and allow their pets to run around in their fenced in yards while they are sleeping or are not home. On the surface this seems like a good idea. It gives the animal more freedom right? Not really. They are still trapped, just now they can see all the stuff they can't get to. And what do they do when they see something they want? They either go under, over or through the fence to get to it, or make your neighbor's lives uncomfortable by loudly complaining that they can't get to it.
Every time I hear dogs barking for hours on end, it occurs to me to wonder how much their owners really must hate animals, to constantly subject them to such cruelty. Yes, the barking is unpleasant to me, but I can tune it out. The dog can't tune out how it feels about being alone and trapped. It can't ignore its sorrow.
Then there are those people who keep their animals inside in cages, in order to reduce the amount of discomfort for other people and to keep the animals from destroying things while they are gone. Yes, this does adequately handle those problems, but I cannot put words to how messed up I think that is. How can you possibly claim to care for your pet when you reduce its world down to a four foot by four foot cube?
So, while I do love animals, I do not believe, for the most part, in having pets. There are exceptions of course. Some people have their lives set up in such a way that there is always someone around to spend time with the animal or some animals that have been domesticated to the point where outside no longer holds any draw.
My personal preference, instead of having a pet, is to have friends that are animals. What I am talking about is animals that can and do take care of themselves but choose to spend time with me because they love me just as much as I love them. That way, we can have a mutual friendship, one based on love and respect and either one of us can move on when or if it becomes time to do so, instead of the master/slave relationship that most pet ownership really is.
Saturday, May 3, 2014
Nothing is more important than everything, sometimes.
There are many different ways for us to learn new things, perhaps nearly as many as there are new things for us to learn. Most of the time though, the methods we employ involve adding that new thing to our current collection of knowledge. We do this by wrapping what we already know around the edges of the new thing, so we can get a firm grip on it before exploring it to the point where we can fully make it our own.
We compare this new thing with all the the things we already know, with what we believe, what we think and what we fear. We apply our preconceived notions to it and based on the things we already know, we automatically begin to extrapolate things about this new thing that "must" be true.
For things like grammar, vocabulary and mathematics, this is often perfectly acceptable. Things that we already have a foundation for, we can just stack the knew knowledge on top of the old. Often the new data follows a logical progression that can be calculated by what we already know.
There are times though, where what we already know is a hindrance, where it can impede and in fact completely prevent us from allowing something new to be learned. Sometimes we have to forget everything we know, in order to learn something new.
Have you ever seen one of those martial arts movies where a teacher is working with a student and they aren't getting anywhere? After awhile the the teacher says I can't teach you, you already know everything. He isn't saying that the student literally knows all that he has to teach. He is saying that he can't teach because what the student already knows keeps getting in the way.
The common analogy used has to do with a cup, where the cup is your brain. Imagine for a moment that I tell you to come to dinner and bring a cup so that I can fill it with the most delicious wine you have ever tasted. If you show up for dinner and you already have that cup filled with brandy, I can't fill your cup with wine, unless you pour out or drink the brandy. I have something wonderful for you, but you won't let me share it with you.
If you are learning a martial art, a new language, religion, philosophy or even just another person's point of view, anything that you don't already have a solid foundation for, all of your collected knowledge about things is useless. And holding on to that knowledge will prevent you from learning about that thing as quickly and accurately as you would otherwise be able to.
There are times where your preconceived notions, your assumptions and your extrapolations are all going to be wrong, times where having a belief about something will taint the experience of actually learning it. Don't make comparisons between this thing and something else you already know. If it is a thing that you know nothing about, comparing it to something else that you do know about is bound to make you look stupid. Let the new thing be new. Experience it for the first time as a child explores their surroundings for the first time when they begin to crawl.
I am not suggesting that you literally erase from your mind all previous knowledge every time you want to learn something new. I am however saying that you need blank space for the new stuff to go and that you should clear that space ahead of time. Instead of wrapping what you know around the edges of the new knowledge, start with a blank area in your mind and let the new thing you are learning grow out until it is large enough to wrap around what you already know about everything else.
Make yourself part of the new thing rather than making the new thing part of yourself.
We compare this new thing with all the the things we already know, with what we believe, what we think and what we fear. We apply our preconceived notions to it and based on the things we already know, we automatically begin to extrapolate things about this new thing that "must" be true.
For things like grammar, vocabulary and mathematics, this is often perfectly acceptable. Things that we already have a foundation for, we can just stack the knew knowledge on top of the old. Often the new data follows a logical progression that can be calculated by what we already know.
There are times though, where what we already know is a hindrance, where it can impede and in fact completely prevent us from allowing something new to be learned. Sometimes we have to forget everything we know, in order to learn something new.
Have you ever seen one of those martial arts movies where a teacher is working with a student and they aren't getting anywhere? After awhile the the teacher says I can't teach you, you already know everything. He isn't saying that the student literally knows all that he has to teach. He is saying that he can't teach because what the student already knows keeps getting in the way.
The common analogy used has to do with a cup, where the cup is your brain. Imagine for a moment that I tell you to come to dinner and bring a cup so that I can fill it with the most delicious wine you have ever tasted. If you show up for dinner and you already have that cup filled with brandy, I can't fill your cup with wine, unless you pour out or drink the brandy. I have something wonderful for you, but you won't let me share it with you.
If you are learning a martial art, a new language, religion, philosophy or even just another person's point of view, anything that you don't already have a solid foundation for, all of your collected knowledge about things is useless. And holding on to that knowledge will prevent you from learning about that thing as quickly and accurately as you would otherwise be able to.
There are times where your preconceived notions, your assumptions and your extrapolations are all going to be wrong, times where having a belief about something will taint the experience of actually learning it. Don't make comparisons between this thing and something else you already know. If it is a thing that you know nothing about, comparing it to something else that you do know about is bound to make you look stupid. Let the new thing be new. Experience it for the first time as a child explores their surroundings for the first time when they begin to crawl.
I am not suggesting that you literally erase from your mind all previous knowledge every time you want to learn something new. I am however saying that you need blank space for the new stuff to go and that you should clear that space ahead of time. Instead of wrapping what you know around the edges of the new knowledge, start with a blank area in your mind and let the new thing you are learning grow out until it is large enough to wrap around what you already know about everything else.
Make yourself part of the new thing rather than making the new thing part of yourself.
Thursday, May 1, 2014
Why do I have to be responsible?
As you may or may not be aware, tomorrow(Friday) is the official opening night for The Amazing Spiderman 2. Early showings are available tonight in select locations and then tomorrow it will be in theaters practically everywhere.
This is a movie I want to see. Most, if not all, of the people that I live with want to see it as well. But left sort things out on their own most of us would not see it. It seems kind of weird to me for something that we are all so excited about, but I have seen it happen many times.
There is a new movie out just about every week that most of us are interested in. Due to our general day to day schedule, most movie watching is done either on Friday, Saturday or Sunday nights. Though, if one of us does not speak up on Wednesday or Thursday about our plans for the weekend, people tend to make plans of their own to do other things. On Friday nights three of us work. On Saturdays we have a game that takes up most of the late afternoon and evening hours. On Sunday some of us do family related events with others outside of the house.
When a new movie comes out that I want to see, typically, I am the one that rallies the troops, sorts out the scheduling conflicts, and the financial concerns. I know we all want to see the latest blockbuster, so I make it happen. If I didn't do it, we would go months without watching movies together. I know this to be true because I have tested it on multiple occasions.
See, I learned something a long time ago that I apply to my everyday life. It is a simple 20 letter phrase made up of ten two letter words.
If it is to be, it is up to me.
This literally means that if something is going to happen, it falls on me to make it happen. Or put a different way, if there is something that matters to me, I am responsible for handling all of the details involved in making it happen. If I fail to do so, then that thing is not as important to me as I may want to believe it is.
People often complain about how something doesn't get done if they don't do it and they wonder why they always have to be the one to make it happen. The simple answer is because they care more about making that thing happen than anyone else around them does. That thing either doesn't matter at all to others or just matters less to them than it does to the one that typically makes it happen. Whining, shouting and complaining about how much they don't like being the one to go through the effort of making it happen isn't fruitful.
Going out to eat and going to movies is pretty much what we do to socialize together, outside the house. It is very important to me. Others in the house say it is important to them as well, but obviously less so.
There is often quite a bit to the logistics of getting us all together at once, especially if we are meeting others that don't live in the house. It can be a lot of work. And I could whine, complain, get frustrated, angry or stressed about it. Or I could just not do it.
Instead I just remind myself that if it is to be, it is up to me. I don't get upset. I smile because I know that I am the one responsible for getting us all together, out of the house, laughing and having a good time. It is worth all the effort and trouble in the end, because I get to see the people I love enjoying themselves.
There are other tasks that are less rewarding that I apply the same logic to. If it is important enough for me to really care about the outcome,it is important enough for me to have a direct hand in guiding that outcome. And if it isn't important enough for me to take part in making it happen, I have no right to complain about the outcome being different than what I would have wanted.
Make this lesson your own and many everyday stresses will simply disappear.
This is a movie I want to see. Most, if not all, of the people that I live with want to see it as well. But left sort things out on their own most of us would not see it. It seems kind of weird to me for something that we are all so excited about, but I have seen it happen many times.
There is a new movie out just about every week that most of us are interested in. Due to our general day to day schedule, most movie watching is done either on Friday, Saturday or Sunday nights. Though, if one of us does not speak up on Wednesday or Thursday about our plans for the weekend, people tend to make plans of their own to do other things. On Friday nights three of us work. On Saturdays we have a game that takes up most of the late afternoon and evening hours. On Sunday some of us do family related events with others outside of the house.
When a new movie comes out that I want to see, typically, I am the one that rallies the troops, sorts out the scheduling conflicts, and the financial concerns. I know we all want to see the latest blockbuster, so I make it happen. If I didn't do it, we would go months without watching movies together. I know this to be true because I have tested it on multiple occasions.
See, I learned something a long time ago that I apply to my everyday life. It is a simple 20 letter phrase made up of ten two letter words.
If it is to be, it is up to me.
This literally means that if something is going to happen, it falls on me to make it happen. Or put a different way, if there is something that matters to me, I am responsible for handling all of the details involved in making it happen. If I fail to do so, then that thing is not as important to me as I may want to believe it is.
People often complain about how something doesn't get done if they don't do it and they wonder why they always have to be the one to make it happen. The simple answer is because they care more about making that thing happen than anyone else around them does. That thing either doesn't matter at all to others or just matters less to them than it does to the one that typically makes it happen. Whining, shouting and complaining about how much they don't like being the one to go through the effort of making it happen isn't fruitful.
Going out to eat and going to movies is pretty much what we do to socialize together, outside the house. It is very important to me. Others in the house say it is important to them as well, but obviously less so.
There is often quite a bit to the logistics of getting us all together at once, especially if we are meeting others that don't live in the house. It can be a lot of work. And I could whine, complain, get frustrated, angry or stressed about it. Or I could just not do it.
Instead I just remind myself that if it is to be, it is up to me. I don't get upset. I smile because I know that I am the one responsible for getting us all together, out of the house, laughing and having a good time. It is worth all the effort and trouble in the end, because I get to see the people I love enjoying themselves.
There are other tasks that are less rewarding that I apply the same logic to. If it is important enough for me to really care about the outcome,it is important enough for me to have a direct hand in guiding that outcome. And if it isn't important enough for me to take part in making it happen, I have no right to complain about the outcome being different than what I would have wanted.
Make this lesson your own and many everyday stresses will simply disappear.
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